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TRADING POSTTel/Fax: 952 597 100 Mobile: 661 166 [email protected] [email protected]

The Original Trading Post, Ctra. Cartama No 3, 29120 Alhaurin el Grande, Málaga.Deposito Legal MA 138-2004

JANUARY ISSUE 2010

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Neil’s NotesHiya all.First of all may I wish everybody a happy new year, I hope you allhad a great festive break and are ready to make 2010 a much betteryear than 2009 (not that it would be difficult). I am optimistic that2010 will bring better times to us all.What about the weather we have been getting here lately? We havehad more or less solid rain for the past month, it is causing a lot ofproblems for people as they find there roofs leaking and watercoming in the windows and doorways, it’s not the sort of thing youexpect from Spain, but at least the Spanish weathermen are nowsaying that the five year drought we have had is now officially over.The problem is that buildings and roads in this part of the worldare not built with rain to the forefront when they are designed,hardly surprising when you look at the general way the weatherbehaves here but when we get an unusual amount of rain they justcan’t cope. It’s a bit like England with the snow, although I knowit’s been an exceptionally long cold snap there, with a lot of snow,it’s surprising that everything seems to have come to a standstill.Other Northern European countries have even more snow, on aregular basis than England has had this winter without it causingproblems that England seems to having at the moment. Thecommon fact between England and Spain at the moment is that theweather they are receiving is not typical and so neither country hasthe infrastructure to deal with it. There does not seem to be muchpoint in either country spending huge sums of money to combatevents that may only happen every thirty years or so, so I suppose wewill all just have to put up with the occasional disruption.Of course if these unusual weather patterns are being caused byglobal warming and they are going to become more common theneveryone will have to review the situation pretty quickly.That’s all from me this month, speak to you all in February.

All the best, Neil

The Original Trading Post, Ctra Cartama No 3,29120 Alhaurin el Grande, Malaga. Tel: 952 597 100.

(Next door to Papeleria Cristina).email: [email protected]

Deposito Legal MA-138 20044 When calling or visiting our advertisers, please state you have seen them in The Original Trading Post. Thank you 5

Gills JokeAn elderly woman decidedto have her portraitpainted. She told the artist,"Paint me with diamondearrings, a diamondnecklace, emeraldbracelets, a ruby broach,and a gold Rolex.""But you are not wearingany of those things,"replied the artist."I know," she said. "It's incase I should die before myhusband. I'm sure he willremarry right away, and Iwant his new wife to gocrazy looking for thejewellery."

6

Household Hints and TipsREMOVING RED WINE STAINS.Did you know, that you can remove red wine stains with soda water?Remove the red wine stain by gently squeezing it in just good club sodawater. It will look like new.REMOVING CANDLE WAX FROM CARPET OR TABLECLOTH.You need a hot iron and blotting paper. Scrape as much wax off as possible.Place the blotting paper on top of the hardened wax and place the hot ironon top of it. Move the blotting paper around to absorb the melting wax.Carry on until it all has been removed, but being careful not to scorch thefabric underneath.REMOVING CHEWING GUM.Put ice cubes into a plastic bag, place on top the chewing gum to harden itand slowly scrape the gum off.REMOVING TAR.Soften the tar with turpentine or unsalted butter, then treat afterwardswith petrol and wash the usual way. It will take a few washes to completelycome out.REMOVING RUST.Rub into fabric lemon juice, sprinkle salt on top and leave to rest for atleast an hour. Rinse and wash in the normal way. Or leave soaking for awhile in a solution of water and glycerin.REMOVING COFFEE STAINS.Dab the stain with glycerin, then rinse in cold water. Wash the normal way.REMOVING SOOT FROM CARPET.Using the nozzle attachment .of the vacuum cleaner clean most of it up.Try not to rub the soot into the carpet. Then sprinkle talcum powder overit and brush in. Vacuum as normal.REMOVING KETCHUP FROM CARPET.Carefully remove excess from carpet, then rub glycerin into the stain.Sponge with warm water trying not to wet the carpet to much.REMOVING RASPBERRY AND REDCURRANT STAINS.Dab the stain with lemon juice, rinse in warm water. Wash in normal way.HOUSE SMELLS OF COOKING, DOG, ETC.Next time you vacuum, add a cotton wool ball soaked with a few drops ofaromatherapy oil, like geranium or lavender into your vacuum cleanerbag. The smell will be gone and a beautiful scent has been added.WINDOW, MIRROR AND GLASS CLEANING.Have no leather or window cloth to add shine? Wash windows or mirrorwith warm water and a drop of vinegar. Wipe with crunched upnewspaper until dry and shiny. They will sparkle like new.SCRATCHES ON DARK WOOD FURNITURE.Make a paste from instant coffee and water. Rub into the scratches, thenwipe off excess with a clean cloth.LILY POLLEN STAINS.Gently dab a cello tape onto the stain. The pollen will stick to the tape. Donot rub

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All about AntequeraAntequera lies 47 km (22 miles) north of the city of Málaga on the A45 road, at the footof the mountain ranges El Torcal and El Arco Calizo Chimenea, 575 m above mean sealevel. It overlooks the fertile valley bounded to the south by the Sierra de los Torcales,and to the north by the river Guadalhorce. It occupies a commanding position, whilethe remains of its walls, and of a fine Moorish castle on a rock that overhangs the town,show how admirably its natural defences were supplemented by art.Significant buildings include many fine churches, the 18th century Palace of Nájera,now the Municipal Museum, and the early 16th century Real Colegiata de Santa Maríala Mayor, a designated national monument that overlooks the whole town. Thebullring, dating from 1848, was rebuilt beginning in 1984, in a style that reflects thecity's diverse architectural influences, and is considered one of the most attractivebullrings in Spain. Antequera contains a fine arch, erected in 1595 in honour of PhilipII, and partly constructed of inscribed Roman masonry.On the northern outskirts of the city there are two Bronze Age burial mounds (barrowsor dolmens) the Dólmen de Menga and Dólmen de Viera, dating from the 3rd millenniumBC. They are the largest such structures in Europe. The larger one, Dólmen de Menga,is twenty-five metres in diameter and four metres high, and was built with thirty-twomegaliths, the largest weighing about 180 tonnes. After completion of the chamber(which probably served as a grave for the ruling families) and the path leading into thecenter, the stone structure was covered with earth and built up into the hill that can beseen today. When the grave was opened and examined in the 19th century, archaeologistsfound the skeletons of several hundred people inside. The Dólmen del Romeral, whichdates from the early 2nd millennium (about 1800 BC), is outside the city. A largenumber of smaller stones were used in its construction. Los Silillos, a significantBronze Age prehistoric village was uncovered several miles north of Antequera.From the 7th century BC, the region was settled by the Iberians, whose cultural andeconomic contacts with the Phoenicians and Greeks are demonstrated by manyarchaeological discoveries. In the middle of the 1st millennium BC, the Iberiansmingled with wandering Celts and Turdetans of southern Spain (Tartessos).In the last third of the 1st millennium BCE, the Iberian peninsula became part of theRoman Empire. The people quickly adopted Roman culture and the Latin language,and the transition to Roman rule was largely peaceful. As in many other places inAndalusia, the current city plan and the name originate from when Spain was part ofthe Roman Empire; the Latin name of the city was Antikaria. Under the Romans, thecity continued to be an important commercial center, especially known for the qualityof its olive oil. The excavated Roman baths can be seen in the southeast part of the city.The Romans were later supplanted by a succession of invading tribes, leadingeventually to domination by the Visigoths.In the year 711 a tribe of Berbers out of North Africa (Moors) invaded Spain. By about716, Antikaria was influenced by Moorish culture, tradition and architecture, andreceived a new name: Medina Antaquira. The Moorish state was known for its religioustolerance, and lasted until 1212, when a coalition of Christian kings drove them fromCentral Spain in the Battle of Las Navas de Tolosa. Over the next few years thedominant Almohad dynasty was defeated and Moorish Al-Andalus greatly reduced instrength. Medina Antaquira, which at that time had a population of about 2,600,became one of the northern cities of the remaining Nasrid kingdom of Granada and animportant border town. To defend against the CatholicSpanish troops from thenorthern kingdoms, fortifications were built, and a castle was erected overlooking thecity: the Alcazaba. Today only a few parts of the walls and some towers can be seen,including a tower called Torre del Homenaje.Ferdinand I of Aragon conquered the city. This gave Ferdinand, who was crowned Kingof Aragon in 1412, the title "Ferdinand of Antequera" (Don Fernando de Antequera),and the main street still carries his name: Calle Infante Don Fernando.


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ARCHThe Andalucian Rescue Centre forHorses held a successful ChristmasFayre at La Finca in Alhaurin elGrande on 12th December. With Santain residence, along with a combinationof sunshine, snow, ´reindeer´ rides andfestive refreshments, the day had amagical feel and great atmosphere.The Christmas carol singing was led byTracy Banks with everyone joining inand music by ACE FM. A big thank youto everyone who came along andsupported ARCH and the numerousstalls. All proceeds were gratefullyreceived and will help us towardsrecent vet bills and the upkeep of oursteadily increasing animal family.

Jan Hunt(Andalucian Rescue Centre for Horses,Donkeys and Mules)Junta de Andalucia Registered Charityno. 8448www.andalucianhorserescue.com


Gills JokesOne evening a family brings theirfrail, elderly mother to a nursinghome and leaves her, hoping she willbe well cared for. The next morning,the nurses bathe her, feed her a tastybreakfast, and set her in a chair at awindow overlooking a lovely flowergarden. She seems OK, but after a while sheslowly starts to lean over sideways inher chair. Two attentive nursesimmediately rush up to catch her andstraighten her up. Again she seemsOK, but after a while she starts to tiltto the other side. The nurses rushback and once more bring her backupright. This goes on all morning.Later the family arrives to see howthe old woman is adjusting to her newhome. "So Ma, how is it here? Are theytreating you all right?" they ask. "It's pretty nice," she replies. "Exceptthey won't let you fart."

WordsearchThe theme is this month is “Space”. See how many you can find.

Solution on page 37.URANUSASTEROIDPLANETSROCKETSASTRONAUTCAPSULEHUBBLEEARTHMERCURYSATURNPLUTOGALAXYJUPITERLAUNCHMARSAPOLLOMOONVENUSNEPTUNECOMETORBITSATELLITES

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CrosswordSolution on page 36

Across1. Portrait with features exaggerated for

comic effect (10) 6. Counterfoil of cheque (4)10. Roman god of love (5)11. Partner (9)12. Possess (3)13. Evade (5)14. Contribution (5)15. Inspect (7)17. Defeat heavily (7)19. Unaffected (7)21. Mysterious (7)23. Power (5)25. Grass cutter (5)27. Tear (3)28. Deficit (9) 29. Influence (5) 30. Frame holding glass in window (4)31. Likeness (10)

Down1. Tropical storm (7)2. Contrite (9)3. Beg (5)4. Speak badly of (7)5. Admiration (7)7. Hobo (5)8. Respire (7)9. Bitterness (8)16. Annoy (8)18. Infamous (9)19. Inescapable agent of downfall (7)20. Pain in the lower back (7)21. Wild primula (7)22. Revolving cylinder used for winding

cable (7)24. Sheen (5)26. Happen again (5)


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When calling or visiting our advertisers, please state you have seen them in The Original Trading Post. Thank you14

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Gills JokeOn their first date, Joe took Rose to the carnival. When he askedher what she wanted to do first, Rose replied, "Get weighed."So Joe took her to the man with the scale who guesses people'sweight. He looked at Rose and said, "One hundred and twentypounds." Since Rose weighed in at one seventeen, she collected aprize.Next they went on the roller coaster. When the ride was finished,Joe asked Rose what she wanted to do next. "Get weighed," shesaid. So they went back to the man with the scale, who of courseguessed Rose's weight correctly.Leaving without a prize, they went for a ride on the merry-go-round. After they got off, Joe asked Rose what she wanted to donext. "I want to get weighed!" she said again.Joe began to think this girl was quite strange, and decided toend the evening quickly. He left her at the door with a quickhandshake.Rose's roommate was waiting up for her to return and asked howthe evening went."Wousy!" Rose replied.


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General Knowledge Quiz1. What cult movie spoof rock band reunited at Glastonbury 2009? 2. Veronica Lario was much in the news as the angry wife of which

womanising European leader? 3. What search engine did Microsoft launch in 2009? 4. Cartoonist and screenwriter Millard Kaufman, who died in March

2009, created which short-sighted character? 5. What iconic record label celebrated its 50th anniversary in 2009? 6. In two minutes, Amanda Dutta Tumuly achieved a new Guinness

world record by eating fifty-one what in two minutes, each rated over one million on the Scoville Scale?

7. Which budget store chain reported record sales of £400m and claimed to be the UK biggest seller of batteries?

8. Which computer game invented by Alexi Pajitnov celebrated its 25th anniversary in 2009?

9. Debate continued about whether to build Heathrow's what (3rd, 4th, 5th or 6th) runway?

10. Whose tour kicked off at Rustenburg on 30 May 2009? 11. What supposedly racist nickname for fellow player Kolin Dhillon was

Prince Charles alleged to have used at his polo club? 12. Who won the 2009 BBC Sports Personality Award? 13. Which monarch's 500th anniversary of accession was featured on a

2009 commemorative £5 coin? 14. Corcoram State Prison California released a new photo of which 74

year old cult-leading mass murderer? 15. Who aged 65 became the oldest Britain to climb Mount Everest, as at

2009? 16. In 2009 the Tamil Tigers conceded defeat as a rebel force in which

country's civil war? 17. Sonia Sotomayor in 2009 became the first Latino or Hispanic person to

be selected for which US institution? 18. What newspaper first exposed the UK parliamentary expenses scandal?19. What successful Broadway musical written by Mel Brooks opened

controversially in Berlin? 20. Which previous Governor of the Bank of England died in April 2009? 21. Who in 2009 became Britain's first individual diving world champion?22. Mir Hossein Mousavi was the beaten opponent in which country's

presidential election? 23. American doctor George Tiller was shot dead in Kansas in June 2009

by an activist protesting against what? 24. Who beat seven foot tall boxer Nikolay Valuev to become the new WBA

heavyweight champion?Answers to last months quiz -1. Finland. 2. Belgium. 3. Cozy Coupe (by Little Tikes). 4. Howdah. 5. Edward Elgar.6. Dong (comprised of 100 Xu). 7. Regents Park. 8. Dionysus. 9. Change colour.10. Nine years. 11. Overlook Hotel. 12. Eyelid (in the upper eyelid, typicallycharacterising the eyes of East Asian people). 13. Neville Chamberlain. 14. AudreyII (Audrey two). 15. Seaweed. 16. Trainspotting. 17. Tahiti. 18. Harpo. 19. RudyardKipling. 20. Gannex. 21. Durham. 22. Egypt. 23. Barbados. 24. Royal Navy. 25.Brazil. 26. Anne Hathaway. 27. Pear. 28. La Scala. 29. Sciatic nerve


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HoroscopesCAPRICORN (December 22nd - January 20th)Too many opportunities and too many changes going on. Youmay have more to do with children this month; keep an openmind. You should make sure that your personal papers are inorder. Your personal situation is fluctuating. Your luckiest events this month will occur on a Monday.

AQUARIUS (January 21st - February 19th)Sudden changes of heart may cause disruptions in yourdomestic scene. Avoid any over indulgences. Your reputationwill be affected. You should regain some of your self esteem ifyou get involved in organizational functions. Your luckiest events this month will occur on a Wednesday.

PISCES (February 20th - March 20th)You need to look into ways to change your self-image. Don't givethem the use of your credit card. You may want to put everyoneto work on a project that will keep them all too busy tocomplain. Anger might lead to carelessness and minor Injuries. Your luckiest events this month will occur on a Thursday.

ARIES (March 21st - April 20th)Be careful not to over exert yourself. This may not be the time tolend or borrow. Minor accidents could occur if you don't takeprecautions. You will be able to borrow money in order to invest.Your luckiest events this month will occur on a Friday.

TAURUS (April 21st - May 21st)In-laws may cause difficulties. Travel should be considered.Property purchases should be on your mind. You can findsolutions if you are willing to communicate. Put your time andenergy into home improvement. Your luckiest events this month will occur on a Saturday.

GEMINI (May 22nd - June 21st)If you can put some work into home improvements, you should.Secret affairs could cause upset. Don't say something you'll liveto regret. They will jump at the chance to do something withoutyou if it sounds like more fun. Your luckiest events this month will occur on a Tuesday.

18

CANCER (June 22nd - July 22nd)Any capricious behavior will confuse loved ones and your moodswings will result in loneliness. Avoid joint ventures and steerclear of groups that want you to contribute financialassistance. Pleasure trips or friendly get-togethers will besatisfying and intellectually stimulating. You will encounterthose who can help you further your goals if you attendfunctions that attract prominent people. Your luckiest events this month will occur on a Sunday.

LEO (July 23rd - August 22nd)Go out with friends and avoid the situation on the home front.Social activity should be on your agenda this month. This willnot be the day to lend money to friends or family. Uncertainchanges regarding your personal life are evident. Your luckiest events this month will occur on a Saturday.

VIRGO (August 23rd - September 23rd)Try not to be too harsh with loved ones; there will always be twosides to an Issue. Your emotions will be touched off concerningrecent encounters with your lover. Get back down to earth andto basics. Disappointments regarding partners will be subjectto the way you react to their personal comments. Your luckiest events this month will occur on a Thursday.

LIBRA (September 24th - October 23rd)Don't confide in any relatives whom you know have a tendencyto meddle in other people's affairs. So smile! Don't be afraid ofopposition; your suggestions are valid. Be aware that a femaleyou work with may be trying to hold you back. Your luckiest events this month will occur on a Friday.

SCORPIO (October 24th - November 22nd)Take time to help children with projects that may be too hardfor them to do on their own. Try not to be too aggressive orjudgmental when talking to your mate. Sentimental feelingsmay make it difficult to get much done at work. You can expectinsincere gestures of friendliness this month. Your luckiest events this month will occur on a Monday.

SAGITTARIUS (November 23rd - December 21st)You are best to stick to yourself this month. Look forprofessional guidance if it will help unite the family. Yourdetermination may make you a little overbearing when dealingwith others. Observations will be far more productive. Your luckiest events this month will occur on a Tuesday.

19


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Gills JokeA fancy lady on vacation took a stroll through the woods.Suddenly a little white duck, all covered with s**t, crossed herpath. "Oh, dear," the lady said, "come on, I'll clean you!" Shetook a Kleenex from her purse and wiped the duck clean. Afterfinishing, she urged the duck away saying, "Be careful nexttime!"She walked on and another duck, with s**t all over it, crossedher way. Again she took out a Kleenex and cleaned the littleduck. She warned this one as well and the duck took off.Soon after, she encountered a third duck with the sameproblem. "Now I've had it!" She whined. "What have you allbeen doing?" And for the third time she acted like a FlorenceNightingale and tended the duck.She continued her stroll when suddenly she heard a voicefrom the bushes. "Hey, you, lady!" sounded a male voice indistress. "Yes?" she replied. "Do you have a Kleenex?" "No, notanymore," she answered. "Too bad. I guess I'll just have to useanother duck."

When calling or visiting our advertisers, please state you have seen them in The Original Trading Post. Thank you22 When calling or visiting our advertisers, please state you have seen them in The Original Trading Post. Thank you

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BASED NEAR ALHAURÍN EL GRANDE


Winter is Coming!!!Well, here we are steaming rather rapidly towards winter. very soon,the memories of one of the hottest summers in years will be a distantthought and we can look forward to pulling on the fleeces andmoaning about how chilly it is at night !! never can please us British!!Already, the phone calls that we are receiving are changing fromwasps and ants to termites and flies. one poor customer called totell us about the new door frames that he replaced two and a halfyears ago because of termite damage. The new wood that thecarpenter had fitted was supposedly sprayed with an anti woodeating insect aerosol that the carpenter did himself. Now, two anda half years down the road, the frames are being eaten again. Oneframe had to be replaced completely and the other six were givenpreventative treatments to halt the new infestation. Remember thatif you have termites in the woodwork of your house, they will not goaway by replacing the wood.....that is just giving them fresh food !NPS only use the best termicide products that have passed therigorous French Wood Protection Standards that are a worldwidebenchmark in termite control. Our products penetrate right to thecentre of the wood, to create a barrier that we have the confidenceto back up with a ten year written guarantee stamped by the Juntade Andalucia. with NPS you are safe in the knowledge that we havebeen serving the Costa del Sol for the last twenty four years and thata dedicated team who really enjoy their work are waiting to helpyou, whatever your problem. Last month I wrote about the incredible new "Fly String System"that we are proud to be distributors for. In September one of thesesystems was fitted in the Benalmadena Bullring Bar with the mostamazing results. Obviously, with bulls and horses in closeproximity, flies were proving to be an ongoing major problem for theowners, Phil and Pam. After trying electronic devices, sprays, ultraviolet lamps and practically every product on the market, theyheard about the NPS "Fly String System" and we fitted it for themthe next day. Ten minutes after fitting, there were twenty three fliesstuck and Pam rang me excitedly that evening, to update thatfigure to over three hundred flies in less than fourteen hours!Spanish customers in the bar were amazed at the efficiency of theferomone impregnated glue string and as a consequence, six morecustomers have joined Browns Restaurant, Benalmadena, El FogonRestaurant, La Cala ,and now the Bull Bar, Benalmadena as flyfree zones. Dave Brown at Browns Restaurant says its the mostefficient fly trapping system he´s ever seen and can´t believe thedifference it has made to his outside terrace.If flies are getting you down, or any other bug is bugging you, thengive Nigel a ring on 606 00 89 40 for advice or to make anappointment.


Gills JokeThere was once a woman who was married to a man who wouldmake extremely load and disgusting farts every morning as soon ashe woke up. Every time he did so, the woman was disgusted and toldhim, "One of these days, you're going to fart your guts out!"One morning the woman got up early to cook a turkey for a partythey were hosting that night. As she looked down at the turkey's gutsand entrails that she had just removed, she got a Mischievous littleidea...The woman then took the turkey entrails and guts and walkedupstairs to her bedroom, where her husband was still sleeping. Shecarefully pulled down his shorts and placed the turkey guts insidethem. She smiled and went back downstairs to finish her work.A few minutes later, she heard her husband wake up with his usual"Sonic-Boom" fart, immediately followed by a blood-curdlingscream. She laughed as she heard him run into the bathroom. A short while later, he came down to the kitchen still panting fromthe scare. She tried to hold back a smile as she asked him what wasthe matter.This was his reply: "Honey, you were right! You said one of thesedays i was gonna fart my guts out. And it happened! But, by thegrace of God and a can of WD-40, I got most of it back in!"


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Interesting FactsIf you are right handed, you will tend to chew your food on your right side. Ifyou are left handed, you will tend to chew your food on your left side.If you stop getting thirsty, you need to drink more water. For when a humanbody is dehydrated, its thirst mechanism shuts off.Chewing gum while peeling onions will keep you from crying.Your tongue is germ free only if it is pink. If it is white there is a thin film ofbacteria on it.The Mercedes-Benz motto is “Das Beste oder Nichts” meaning “the best ornothing”. The Titanic was the first ship to use the SOS signal.The pupil of the eye expands as much as 45 percent when a person looks atsomething pleasing.The average person who stops smoking requires one hour less sleep a night.Laughing lowers levels of stress hormones and strengthens the immunesystem. Six-year-olds laugh an average of 300 times a day. Adults only laugh15 to 100 times a day.The roar that we hear when we place a seashell next to our ear is not theocean, but rather the sound of blood surging through the veins in the ear.Dalmatians are born without spots.Bats always turn left when exiting a cave.The ‘v’ in the name of a court case does not stand for ‘versus’, but for ‘and’ (incivil proceedings) or ‘against’ (in criminal proceedings).The reason honey is so easy to digest is that it’s already been digested by a bee.

Pay one annual fee and your medical serviceswithin the surgery during the whole year

will be FREE OF CHARGEAnnual Fee approx 150€ per person

Special Family Package 350€ per yearRegister or renew your contract for one year

between 15th November and 31stDecember 2009 and there will be nothingmore to pay for in-surgery treatments until

January 2011.

• All aspects of medicine including gynaecology• Minor surgical interventions• All kinds of analysis available• Translation of medical reports

• Home visits• Appointments with English speaking

consultants in the region• 24 Hours Emergency Service Available

Doctor I. Ch. M. van MeerGMC: MD, TGP

GENERAL PRACTITIONER

Please visit our new website: www.medicalcentrealhaurin.comTelephone/Fax: 952 597 230 Mobile: 618 932 554Español - English - Nederlands - Français - Deutsch

Open Monday-Friday 10.00 - 13.00 and 17.00 - 19.00 Except Wednesday AfternoonPlease call for an appointment - Cruz de la Mision 37-3B, Alhaurin el Grande (Above SolBank)

Snow Matter WhatA belated Happy New Year to you all. Today we have six inches of snow cloggingup the roads, it is still falling. It makes me wonder about England, not so longago we were the tops at everything. We went to war, we had the best trained army,the best planes, boats, equipment. If we built anything it was built to last,nowadays we seem unable to cope with the slightest little thing without itbecoming a complete disaster. Fifteen inches of snow in Moscow, buses, trainsand planes all operate. Three foot blizzards in the USA and their traffic carrieson as if nothing happened. Six inches of snow in England, all airports closed,trains cancelled, roads closed, and half the population without electric and gas,what a total mess, what an earth will it be like when we haven’t got Globalwarming. All this is happening because we will not pay the full price to protectour country, everything we do has to be “on the cheap’’, unfortunately, in thisworld you get what you pay for. Most of our expense fiddling MP’s are far tooblinkered to see what is really happening, even less bothered about trying to stopit. They would much rather borrow billions to save the banks or to give away toother countries than to put their own house in order. Sadly, I do not think theConservatives will fare much better when the present bunch of imbeciles arekicked out at the next election. Why, because you can’t put the genie back in thebottle. The country is overrun with immigrants and workshy English and nobenefits system in the world can cope with such demand. Many British viewhaving a job as a laugh, why bother, you can get more by staying at home andbanging out half a dozen kids which is much more fun, with free housing and notax to pay, it is not the kind of incentive to get people back to work. It would begreat if we all got a couple of grand a week from the government and no one hadto work, great that is, until you went to the shops and they were closed becausethe staff had no need to come to work as they were all off trying to spend their twogrand, but nowhere was open. The problem is that the present government havehad one huge success whilst they have been in power, it outweighs all theirfailures by miles. They have managed to produce a generation of non-workerswho will pass that ethic down to their families for generations to come. Non-working mothers and fathers produce non-working children, that is fact, it isthe legacy of Gordon Brown. Why has Scotland got its own parliament yet a lotof Westminster’s finest are Scot’s, what are they doing in an English Parliament,surely there is either one for each country or just one? It is because of all thesenon-producers, that we cannot afford proper infrastructure and are lookingmore like a third world country everyday , they are sucking the system dry, thoseof you still lucky enough to be in Spain should thank the dear Lord on a dailybasis. Today over three hundred schools were closed because the poor teacherscould not get in, I bet the local shopping will be packed though, all moaningabout the weather, whilst drinking their overpriced Latte’s and Cappuccino’s.£5.20 for a coffee and small (and I mean small) Eccles cake, daylight robbery,it’s a good thing I’m a pensioner or I would not be able to afford it. I was goingout sledging but it’s against health and safety regulations unless I’ve got threegrands worth of protective clothing on that weighs three and a half tons, whichmeans I can’t sledge anyway. Find something you enjoy in England and there isalways a rule or regulation that prevents you from doing it, the land of thekilljoy. I reckon 2010 will be a disaster and no different from 2009, 2008 and allthe rest. There is no will for change and until everyone gets so het up and taketo the streets to say,’’ we are fed up with the way things are, we want better’’,then, and only then, things might improve. Still, as my Gran used to say, makethe most of what you’ve got, I intend to do just that. Happy 2010Roger and Out

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This Month in History - JanuaryJanuary 1, 1502 - Portuguese explorers landed at Guanabara Bay on the coast of SouthAmerica and named it Rio de Janeiro (River of January). January 2, 1905 - The Russians surrendered to the Japanese after the battle of PortArthur during the Russian-Japanese War. January 3, 1924 - British Egyptologist Howard Carter found the sarcophagus ofTutankhamen in the Valley of the Kings near Luxor after several years of searching. January 4, 1790 - President George Washington delivered the first State of the Unionaddress. January 5, 1968 - Alexander Dubcek became first secretary of Czechoslovakia'sCommunist Party.January 6, 1990 - Poland's Communist Party disbanded and then reorganized as theSocial Democratic party, an opposition party to Solidarity. January 7, 1714 - A patent was issued for the first typewriter designed by Englishinventor Henry Mill.January 8, 1918 - In the aftermath of World War I, President Woodrow Wilson proposedhis Fourteen Points calling for a reduction of arms, self determination for governments,and the creation of a League of Nations. January 9, 1960 - With the first blast of dynamite, construction work began on theAswan High Dam across the Nile River in southern Egypt. January 10, 1863 - The world's first underground railway service opened in London, theMetropolitan line between Paddington and Farringdon. January 11, 1861 - In events leading to the American Civil War, Alabama seceded fromthe Union. January 12, 1879 - In Southern Africa, the Zulu War began between the British and thenatives of Zululand, ultimately resulting in the destruction of the Zulu Empire. January 13, 1893 - The British Independent Labor Party was founded with James KeirHardie as its leader. January 14-23, 1943 - President Franklin Roosevelt and Prime Minister WinstonChurchill met at Casablanca, Morocco, to work on a strategy for concluding World War II.January 15, 1535 - Henry VIII became Supreme Head of the Church in England as aresult of the Act of Supremacy following his break with Rome. January 16, 1991 - The war against Iraq began as Allied aircraft conducted a majorraid against Iraqi air defenses.January 17, 1945 - During World War II, Warsaw, Poland, was liberated by Soviet troops.January 18, 1966 - Robert Clifton Weaver was sworn in as the first African Americancabinet member in U.S. history.January 19, 1983 - Former Gestapo official Klaus Barbie, known as the "Butcher ofLyon," was arrested in Bolivia, South America. January 20, 1649 - At the conclusion of the English Civil War, King Charles I wasbrought before a high court of justice at Westminster Hall on charges of treason.January 21, 1793 - In the aftermath of the French Revolution, King Louis XVI of Francewas guillotined on the charge of conspiring with foreign countries for the invasion ofFrance.January 22, 1901 - Queen Victoria of England died after reigning for 64 years, thelongest reign in British history. January 23, 1943 - In North Africa, British forces under Field Marshal Montgomerycaptured Tripoli in Libya. January 24, 1965 - Winston Churchill (1874-1965) died. January 25, 1533 - King Henry VIII married his second wife, Anne Boleyn. January 26, 1788 - The British established a settlement at Sydney Harbor in Australia. January 27, 1945 - The Soviet army liberated Auschwitz. January 28, 1547 - King Henry VIII of England died. January 29, 1916 - The first bombings of Paris by German zeppelins took place.January 30, 1649 - King Charles I of England was beheaded for treason.January 31, 1943 - German troops surrendered at Stalingrad.


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The Original Trading Post Advertising Rates 2009

SIZE OF AD

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35


Crossword Solutionfrom page 12

Gills JokeAn airplane full of a shipment of Pepsi flying over Africa had amalfunction, and went down. A few weeks later, the Pepsi Companysent a rescue plane. They searched the area and found a tribe ofcannibals.They walked up to the Chief of the tribe and asked him if he knewanything about the crash.The Chief said, "You betcha!"When asked where the crew was, the Chief replied, "We ate the crew,and we drank the Pepsi."The Rescue crew were shocked. One man asked, "Did you eat theirlegs?"The chief replied, "We ate their legs, and we drank the Pepsi."Another rescuer asked, "Did you eat their arms?"The Chief replied, "We ate their arms, and we drank the Pepsi."After looking totally perplexed for a minute, a third asked, "Didyou...you know...eat, their...'things'?"The chief says, "No.""No?" asked the rescuer."No," replied the Chief, "THINGS go better with Coke."

37

Solution to Wordsearchon page 10.

Sunday 31st January 2010on Torremolinos Promenade

Registra�on from 10amWalk/Stroll starts at 11am

Walk starts from the car park next to the beach at theParador de Golf (the road opposite Plaza Mayor).You can choose either a 2.5 or 5km route. At 2.5km isthe Bar Poseidon where there will be a BBQ, drinks &compe��ons.Bring your dogs! Prize for the “Waggiest Walk Tail”(that’s the dogs not you!)

Gills JokeA single Chinese man owns aChinese restaurant, and one daya beautiful Chinese woman walksin. He immediately walks overand asks her out on a date. Sheagrees. They go out for a while,and soon, the man proposes toher. She says "Yes, but before wedo, there`s something you mustknow. I have never had the sex,but I`ve read about it." He saysthat it`s not a problem, and theyare married. On their honeymoon,the man tells his wife that sinceshe`s a virgin, she can choosewhat they do first. She says "Oh,most honorable husband. I amhonored to be your wife, eventhough I have never had the sex,but I`ve read about it. So, I havechosen to have the 69. Thehusband looks confused, andafter thinking about it, he says

38

ROASTED HAKE (MERLUZA)ON A BED OF POTATOES

INGREDIENTS:

4 skinless Hakes fillets (each about 8 ounces)Salt (Sea Salt)

Freshly ground Black Pepper1 lb medium-size Potatoes, peeled

1/3 cup extra-virgin Olive Oil8 large Garlic cloves, thinly sliced

1 small dried Red Chili2 tbsp Sherry Vinegar

Minced fresh Flat-Leaf Parsley

PREPARATION:

Preheat the oven to 5000F. Rub the hake with salt and pepperand let stand while you prepare the potatoes. Place the potatoesin a saucepan. Add salted water to cover by 2 inches and bringto a boil. Cook the potatoes until they just begin to feel tender

when pierced with a skewer, 25 minutes or longer depending ontheir size. Do not overcook. Drain the potatoes and let cool

enough to handle, then, cut them into slices. Generously coat a10-inch ovenproof skillet with oil. Arrange the potatoes in a

slightly overlapping layer on the bottom. Sprinkle the potatoeswith salt.

Place 1/3 cup olive oil and the garlic in a small skillet and heatover medium-low heat until the oil simmers and the garlic justbegins to take on color, about 2 minutes. Add the chili and stirfor 15 seconds. Using a slotted spoon, transfer the garlic and

chili to a bowl. Add the vinegar to the skillet and immediatelycover it, as the oil will splatter. Cook, covered, for the flavors to

blend, 2 minutes, turn off the heat, and let stand.

Pour some of the vinaigrette over the potatoes and scatter someof the fried garlic and chili over them. Arrange the hake fillets

on the potatoes, pour the remaining vinaigrette on top, andscatter the remaining garlic and chili over them. Bake the fish

until it just flakes when tested with a fork, 10 to 12 minutesdepending on the thickness. Sprinkle the parsley on top and

serve.

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FORTHCOMING EVENTS FORJANUARY IN AND AROUND OUR AREA

The Coin Branch of the Royal British Legion meets on the first and thirdWednesday of each month 11.00am at the Hotel El Palomar, UrbanizationMiraville, Los Llanos de Coin. For information see our website atwww.coinrbl.info or contact Jo on 952 451 671 or Den on 952 453 829Welfare number 672 025 756. Non-members most welcome.Forthcoming EventsTuesday 12 January - Dining Group meet at 7.30 p.m. at RestaurantLakhanpore, Alhaurin El Grande. Book with Audrey at any of themeetings or on 952454272/665650140. €5 deposit required. Wednesday 13 January - Photography/Videography Group.Photoshoot atGuzmans Garden Centre Alhaurin de la Torre. Meet at La Trocha 10.30a.m. or the Coffee Shop at 11.00 a.m. Theme "Colours and GardenOrnaments". For more details contact Monique on 629221173.Saturday 16 January - Branch 4th Birthday Party Celebration, at La Cruzde la Piedra, 7.30 p.m. for 8 p.m. Price €20 to include four course meal andentertainment by Southern Impact (formerly 'Im and 'Er) Smart attire,please. Tickets from Mary 951240851/606923624.Tuesday 19 January - Trip to the Market at Los Jardines, Del Trapiche.Followed by lunch and shopping at Centro Commercial El Ingenio, ValezMalaga. Leave La Trocha at 9.30 a.m. Arrive at the market approx 10.30a.m. Browse around the market and have coffee then onward to ValezMalaga. Members €10, non members €12 -coach only- from Cath on952450678 or at any meeting. Book by 6 January. Wednesday 20 January - Social Meeting at 11.00 a.m. at Hotel El Palomar.Short presentation by Leslie from Warmwaves. Followed by "The Cube".Selected contestants will try and beat "The Cube". Raffle and Quiz. Monday 25 January - 1st meeting of the new Cookery Club at 2.30 p.m atHotel El Palomar. Hone your knife skills and some suggestions on what todo with surplus seasonal produce. Monday 25 January - Poppy Event - Burns Night Hotel El Palomar, 7.00p.m. for 7.30 p.m. Haggis with a whiskey toast. Readings of Rabbie Burns.Poetry Competition. Dancing, not necessarily Scottish. Tickets €10 fromPolly 654254799. Wednesday 27 January - Walking Group. Park Juanar. Meet near Hotelat 11.00 a.m. Names to Den by 20 January.Sunday 31 January- Sunday Market at La Trocha. Open approx 0900 -1400. Please let David have any items or Bric a Brac that you can spare forsale on the stall.Every Sunday - market in the car park (under cover) at the La TrochaCommercial Centre in Coin.KARENSWAY DOG TRAINING - Classes are a mixture of obedience andagility. I like to incorporate agility into my classes as 1 hour of solidobedience is too much for puppies and most dogs. Classes are currently onWednesdays at 10:00 at the Campo de Fútbol (Km 48.8) on the A343Pizarra to Alora road. Classes have a duration of 1 hour. Any changes willbe advised accordingly. Please phone to reserve a place. Tel: +34 952 112115 Mob: +34 695 479 001.

BU

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TAB

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page

Animal Care/Pets/Food

22 Posh Pets 952597035

Bars/Restaurants/Hotels

24 Mrs Chippy 666628879

Builders and Plant Hire

13 Abbey Construction 620081371

23 Frank Multiservices 669009821

21 Groves & Walker 655040648

15 Km/00 absolutebuild 626362272

25 Webb & Sons 649526922

Car Mechanic

5 Paul Mobile Mechanic 619506453

Car Rental

9 Rent A Car 3000 639682081

Charities

9 ARCH

37 CHAIN/SOS

Computers & Satellite

5 Camposat 639501288

20 Mint Micro 951160411

14 RSS Satellite 657086989

Domestic

33 Houseproud 661166122

23 Mr. Wizard 678493955

Drain Specialists

28 Drain & Leak Solutions 651111005

Electricians

23 Frank Multiservices 669009821

20 Jeff Barrett 659862691

Experts

7 Monica 619828098

Funeral Plans

BC SPN Funeral Plans 952491788

Health & Beauty

17 Alhaurin Dental 654996026

20 Brorson Dentists 952499366

10 Dr. Miguel Lopez Ruiz 649813601

30 Dr. I. Ch.. M. van Meer 618932554

Insurance

3 The Insurance Centre 952451024

2 Seviour Insurance 952499347

Liquid Chalk

23 Liquid Chalk 627402143

Laundry

11 Bubbles 952453662

Pest Control

26/27 NPS Pest Control 606008940

Printing & Promotional

9/28 The Original Trading Post 952597100

Removals/Couriers

7 Witham Brothers 687113944

Security

29 Oracle 680681038

Welders

21 Groves & Walker 655040648

43

Mag Features

16 General Knowledge Quiz

18/19 Horoscope

39 Forthcoming Events

40 Bus Timetable

41 Handy Info/Markets/Trains

35 Advertising Rates

10 Wordsearch

24 Sudoku

34 Business Boost Packages

38 Recipes

12 Crossword

ADVERTISE HERE(HALF PAGE)

IN ONE COLOURFOR AS LITTLE AS

€43.20PER MONTH

(When Booking for 3 months)

For all yourPromotional Printing,

T-shirts,Key Rings,

For Sale Boards,Shop Signs,

A-Boards, CarSignage etc.

Phone:952 597 100

or email:[email protected]

for a no obligation quote.

What would happen if one of us dies in Spain?Ask yourself these questions:

1. Would you know who to call in the first place?2. Would they know the Spanish system regarding funerals?

3. Would they be able to cope with local laws and regulations in Spain?4. Normally funerals are held within 48 hours. Would family have time to get here?

5. Would funds be readily available to cover all costs?6. Could you cope with the above at a time of great sadness and stress?

Makes you think, doesn’t it?

If you cannot answer even one of these questions positively then one ofyour priorities should be to contact SPN today for more information aboutFuneral Plans.

Benefits: • Prices fixed at today’s costs - inflation proof.• Payable by lump sum or deposit plus instalments (no interest charged), in Euros Bank Transfer or Sterling at today’s rate.

• We only use reputable Spanish Funeral Directors with English-speaking staff who are fully knowledgeable about the Spanish system.

• Only one call to make to our dedicated 24 hour bereavement helpline. • All arrangements are in place from day one in accordance with your specific requirements.

SPN plans start from €2350.00

Please contact SPN Funeral Plans SL for more information on:

(0034) 952 595 691 or 952 491 788 Mobile 691 422 981Website: www.spnfuneralplans.com e-mail: [email protected]

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