better than ever before having just added four pages to the paper. And what’s more, we’re hiring! So whether you fancy yourself as a hard-nosed news reporter, a burgeoning theatre critic, have an eye with a camera or just want to review events for the free press pass, get involved. Anyone can work for us and there is something to interest everyone. We will provide training for everyone, so if you’re new to the world of journalism, don’t panic.

Those looking to get really stuck in can apply for deputy section editor positions between Sunday 13 and Friday 18 September. Every section ed-itor has a few deputies to help gather and edit content. This is the perfect way to get more involved without taking on a full editorial position.

For more information, you can find us at the Freshers’ Fayre or come by our information evening on Thursday 17 September. Make sure to look out for our first issue of the semester which is also out on Thursday 17th – you can pick up a copy from the library, the Union or the North Haugh.

Have a great year!

Rachael Miller Editor

Freshers’ 2015 2

Letter from theEditor

Hello and welcome to The Saint’s 2015 Freshers’ magazine! We’ve filled the magazine with advice and tips, guides, maps and in-formation to help you through your first days in beautiful St

Andrews. Along with this, keep an eye on our online Freshers’ hub for all the latest Freshers’ Week reviews and news. We hope it helps and that you enjoy your Freshers’ Week!

The Saint is St Andrews’ award winning student newspaper and the big-gest print publication in town. We produce a 40 page print newspaper five times a semester, as well as keeping our website constantly updated with the latest news, events reviews, sports coverage and more. With around 40 staff positions and even more writers, photographers, videographers, illustrators and salespeople, we pride ourselves on being made completely by the students, for the students. Most importantly, we are completely in-dependent of both the Students’ Association and the University; we fund ourselves and they have no control over our content, meaning we are truly free to be the independent voice of St Andrews students.

We have seven written sections; News, Viewpoint, Money, Features, Events, Arts & Culture and Sport. On top of that, we have a thriving pho-tography team, an illustration team and an ever growing video team. The Saint also has its own business team who work hard to sell ads and fund the paper.

The Saint has been around since 1997, but right now we are bigger and

Table of ContentsMap of St Andrews 3What I wish I had been told about Freshers’ Week 4The complete guide to Freshers’ Week events 5How to choose your modules 6A guide to St Andrews’ balls 7Past Freshers’ tell all 85 foods to cure your hangover 9Our town, our traditions 10-11Let’s talk about accomodation 12-13The classic Buzzfeed university list: St Andrews style 14-157 things to expect from Saints sport 1612 dorm essentials you might not have thought to pack 17How to do Freshers’ Week on a budget 18

Design:

Mina Omar, Deputy Editor (Print)Rachael Miller, Editor

Illustrations:

Dillon Yeh: Cover, Map of St AndrewsSibilla Grenon: Our town, our traditions

Freshers’ 20153

Freshers’ 2015 4

What I wish I had been told about Freshers’ WeekDear Incoming Freshers,

T here are many rites of passage in a per-son’s life. First words. Learning to walk.

Learning to ride a bike (although in my case I was 19 when I did that). First day of school. First sip of beer (or in my case a misjudged bottle of whiskey due to a poor knowledge of alcohol, culminating in an explosion on my bathroom floor. Sorry Mum.) Graduation. However, for many young, beautiful and intelligent people such as ourselves here in St Andrews, there is no rite of passage quite like one’s Freshers’ Week.

I thoroughly enjoyed my first Freshers’ last year. I think. I don’t really remember. I don’t know. I wasn’t arrested. I’m sure I had a good time. There was a lot I did, a lot I didn’t do and a lot I wish I didn’t do. Hindsight is beautiful they say. Hindsight is a useless link between alcohol and regret I say. However, what I can do, is use my hindsight for the benefit of others. Gather my pearls of wisdom and herald them to the masses in the most facetious way possi-ble. So here it is. Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, those who do not subscribe to gender binaries: what I wish I was told in my Freshers’ Week.

It’s September. The excitement is tangible. The questions unfathomable. Facebook pag-es, both a blessing and a curse, are in abun-dance. A useful fountain of knowledge, and a platform for your own embarrassment. The first thing I wish I was told in prepara-tion for Freshers’ Week – don’t be that guy from the Facebook page.

Obviously, with my entire lack of com-mon sense, I missed this memo. I was in-deed that guy on the Facebook page. Not the one who asked if Scotland had running water, not the one who quizzed about read-ing lists or intellectual equals to join socie-ties with me. I was that drunk guy on the

Facebook page. The one that posted memes about Nandos at 3 am. The one that posted rows of emojis attached to intangible speech and a selfie on the Agnes Blackadder page. This did in the end have its pros and cons. A few people already saw me as a fun lov-ing person who could entertain a party. Many others thought I was the type to kid-nap them and keep them in my basement. Contain your excitement pals or you’ll look like a weirdo and cringe about it for months to come. (NB: I still post drunk on the Hall Facebook page. I claim it’s out of irony. It’s not.)

The second thing I wish I was told about my Freshers’ Week - you may have left high school, but people are still keeping tabs. I distinctly remember my second night of Freshers’ Week. Emailing an old school teacher a photo of me and a friend drinking out of her subject trophy from school. Sent with the caption ‘Boozin’. And I can safely say that although you may have left school they will still tell your mother and she will call, concerned. Be aware.

Next, and I will just be blunt. Don’t sleep

with anyone during Freshers’ Week. Just don’t do it. Don’t sleep with anyone ever. Abstinence. Save it for Dundee (if you’re brave, that place is rough). It will haunt you. You will see them in Tesco. You will make awkward conversation over milk. Your friends will stand and laugh. Just. Don’t. Do. It. (But if you do for goodness sake use protection).

On a slightly less depraved note, I wish I knew that making friends was a lot easier than I anticipated, but remembering their names the next day was a lot harder than anticipated. Tip: take a selfie with said new friend, print it out and write their name on

it. Keep a folder. And every time they come and talk to you look frantically through said folder and save yourself the embarrassment of forgetting someone’s name. Or, just take the easy route and admit you were drunk and have no clue who your new bestie walk-ing to class with you is called or what colour their dog is or what day of the week it is be-cause you’re a tragic hungover mess.

This one is a lifesaver. Know when to go to bed. I distinctly remember my friend Gemma McDougall (she has given me per-mission to name and shame) on her first night of Sinners. Initiation. She does not remember this night. I am not surprised. It was not pleasant to be dragged into the la-dies toilet and watch a girl in a shower cap and Finding Nemo arm-bands head first in a toilet, crying for her dignity and spewing it into the basin. Gemma had to get a foil blan-ket. Gemma had to get a wheelchair. Gemma got fined. Know when to go to bed. And go.

Finally, the main thing I wish I was told about Freshers’. Or rather, at least remind-ed about Freshers’. It only lasts a week. You are at University for a reason. By all means,

enjoy first year, be reckless, and go out five nights a week. But go to class more than once. Do your homework. Eat your vegeta-bles. Call your mother.

So that’s my pseudo guide to Freshers’ Week. I might not be able to tell you how to matriculate, or find your adviser, or put printer credits on your card. But I can share my experience which we can all agree is in-valuable. See you at the Union, and if my ad-vice helped in any capacity or alternatively put awful ideas into your head, you owe me a drink.

Learn my friends. Learn and thrive. And drink.

“Sincerely, Bernie MunroViewpoint deputy editor

”For many young, beautiful and intelligent people

such as ourselves here in St Andrews, there is no rite of passage quite like one’s Freshers’ Week.

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At A Glance

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The complete guide to Freshers’ Week eventsBy: Events editor, Nora Stai

With copious American college movies and colourful stories from older siblings painting vivid pictures of what the first week of university may be like, the expectations for Freshers’

Week are high. Yet, with the late-August bombardment of posters and promotional videos of “not-to-miss” events, it can be difficult to navi-gate through the many offers of society gatherings, house parties and hall-sponsored mixers. For this reason, The Saint has compiled a guide to Freshers’ Week events: with everything from alternatives to the bet-ter-known Freshers’ events to day activities for the restless, this guide is all you need for your first week in St Andrews.

Society EventsGetting involved in the society scene in St Andrews is one of the best ways of getting to know people when you first arrive. This year, the Russian Society is hosting a garden party (Tuesday 8 September) serving a variety of Russian foods and traditional Russian tea. The Hispanic Society is hosting one of their infamous Sangria nights the week after Freshers’. The Fine Food and Dining Society — unsurprisingly one of the University’s most popular socie-ties — will be offering free canapés in front of the Union throughout Frehsers’ Week. If this alone doesn’t sound incredibly tempting, they will also be of-fering food tours around St Andrews. Art Soc are also hosting an overnight Creative Lock-in at the Barron theatre from 11pm on Thursday 10 September.Music and Nightlife

Though this year’s headliners for Freshers’ Week at the Union may not necessarily cater to everyone’s taste, your Freshers’ experience doesn’t need to be completely lacking in great music. Starfields will bring the ultimate concert experience on Thursday 10 September. Featuring major acts such as the hit house producer, Klingande, Starfields is back, prom-ising a bigger and better show than ever before.

Music is Love (the Students’ Association’s music society) and the Union’s radio station STAR are also colaborating to bring you a day of live music in the Botanic Gardens on Sunday 13 September, called Summer Vibes.

This is not to say that the Union here in St Andrews doesn’t offer the events that the movies so faithfully promised: Sinners (Wednesday 9 September) and This is St Andrews (Sunday 13 September) are certain successes every year: with the Union packed to the brim there is no better way to get a taste of St Andrews nightlife.

Alternative EventsPounding music, bubble machines and copious drinking is not everyone’s idea of a good time: for a more low-key, intimate Freshers’ experience, visit Topping and Company — St Andrews’ newest but most beloved bookstore — to meet Philip Kerr (Monday 14 September), author of the Lady from Zagreb, or Richard Dawkings (Wednesday 16 September) for lectures on their most recent works.

For the gym-junkies and fitness enthusiasts, Freshers’ Week activities do not have to hinder you from getting your fix: take part in Mr G’s MND 5 KM Fun Run (Sunday 13 September) — a charity run organised by a pupil from Madras College to support research into Motor Neuron Disease.

Want to get to know your new home better? Bring your friends on the St Andrews Ghost Tour (Sunday 6 September) to discover the town’s spooky past.

The Bubble @ The Union Clan Warfare @ The UnionHammered Hungry Hippos @ The Vic

601 Live @ The UnionBYOV @ The Vic

Jedward @ The UnionDONT WALK’s ‘The Society Room’ @ The Vic

Sinners @ The UnionLet’s Get Quizical @ The Vic

The Big Freshers’ Icebreaker @ DundeeStarfields @ Lower College LawnArt Soc Creative Lock-in @ Barron Theatre

P.U.L.L @ The UnionUnder Canvas Launch Party @ 1 Golf Place

SUB 601 @ The UnionHistory Soc Pub Crawl @ The Union

This is St Andrews @ The UnionSecret Cinema @ The Vic Summer Vibes @ The Botanic Gardens

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How to choose your modules

Freshers’ 2015 6

Picking the right modules can be difficult, here is what Features editor Emma Freer has to say

Choose what you like...The brilliant thing about university is it gives you the chance to study exactly what you like for four years among like-minded people. Very few jobs sound this appealing, so take advantage of your student status and personalise your schedule by choosing the three subjects that appeal to you most. American students, especially, will be glad to know that this is not a liberal arts education. Don’t like maths? No problem. Love books? Take English and Comparative Literature!

...not what sounds good

There is a lot of pressure to study a competitive subject, one that will lead to job offers or postgraduate positions; however, choosing a module solely on the basis that it looks good on paper is often a mistake. Many students finish their first year economics modules only to realise that the subject is either too challenging or too boring to continue with (or that they were never that interested in the first place). Ditto Arabic. If you are committed to learning this language, take the class! But if you only want to pad your CV, stay clear: the final exam is no joke.

Try something newThe challenge of choosing your modules lies in striking the balance between the familiar and unfamil-iar. Sometimes the most interesting modules are subjects that are totally foreign to you. When I chose my first year modules, I was only familiar with one of the three subjects: English. The other two – social anthropol-ogy and art history – were completely new to me, but I was weirdly committed to studying them.

Thankfully, the risk paid off. I will be graduat-ing this spring with a joint degree in social anthropology and English. And my two years studying art history have paid off handsomely. The department has some of the best lecturers I have had and I gained loads of prac-tical knowledge that never fails to come in handy on museum tours or at dinner par-ties. Plus, the subject meshed well with my other courses; I was constantly surprised to learn something in one class only to have it come up the next week in another.

This is kind of an inflammatory statement, but it is (mostly) true. At St Andrews, the grades you earn during your first two years do not count towards your degree. Though of course, these modules are important, both as preparation for honours-level courses and as a chance to famil-iarise oneself with the University’s grading system.

Honours-level courses are generally both harder and more harshly marked than sub-honours ones, so it would be a mistake to take it easy those first two years. However, the beauty of the system is it gives you the chance to make a few mistakes before things really count. One bad grade during first year will not tank your GPA. The other advantage here is that you are able to take at least one subject purely for the enjoyment of learning about it. My art history grades were usually my lowest, but I learned a tonne. And because I did not continue with the subject at honours level, the grades were never an issue. Just make sure you pass.

Grades don't matter

Stick with itUnless a class is unbearable, you should try to stay on task. Constant dropping and adding makes for a confusing schedule (and peeved advisors). Plus, there is value in sticking with a subject for the long haul. Looking back, I did not love any of my sub-honours English

modules because they were all so broad. But my honours mod-ules in this department have been absolutely fantastic and much

more focused. In the end, they were definitely worth the wait.

Even with a perfect schedule, the best lecturers and a genius tutor, you can have a miserable semester if you do not show up for class or do the readings. It might give you more time for sleeping, going out and bonding with your hall mates, but is it worth those horribly awkward

moments in tutorials when you are asked a question and are completely clueless (and everyone knows it)? Or when you are having a full-fledged panic attack ahead of an exam because your essay grades were mediocre

and you have not done any of the reading? In addition, it is crucial to develop good study habits ahead of third year, when classes

get more difficult. Think of sub-honours as a trial run: the grades do not matter, but – you know what

they say – practice makes perfect.

Show up

Illustration: Flo McQuibban

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Picking the right modules can be difficult, here is what Features editor Emma Freer has to say

Freshers’ 20157

A guide to St Andrews’ [many] balls

The St Andrews ball scene is a unique and wonderful creature, filling every student’s

social calendar with a dazzling array of events, from big crowd pleasers to quirky and small af-fairs. However, some balls are more Cinderella than others. Balls can be pretty expensive so it is a good idea to think ahead and plan which you’ll be spending your money on. With this guide, you shall go to the ball(s).

Editor Rachael Miller tells you which balls are worth the money and which really aren’t

Top TipEven if you’re not graduating, if you find yourself in St Andrews over the summer, get a group of friends together and go to Graduation Ball. You’ll have a blast!

Getting tickets for the most popular balls can be a nightmare. For May Ball, though the

first ticket is not sold until ten in the morning, the first tent in the queue is often pitched short-ly before midnight. Although tents have only ever been spotted for May Ball tickets, you can also expect to queue for hours for Christmas Ball tickets and, to a lesser extent, Glitter Ball and Nobel Ball.

Friends frequently work in shifts, handing off the responsibility of waiting in the mam-

moth queue hour by hour. Realistically, arriv-ing any later than 6am will not guarantee you a ticket for Christmas or May Ball. This has led to the creation of companies such as Q4U, who offer to stand in the queue on your behalf, in exchange for a small fee. Unfortunately, for the more popular balls, only a handful of tickets (if any) are offered online, and ultimately, a suc-cessful checkout comes down to luck rather than speed.

Thanks to Facebook, the St Andrews sec-ondhand ticket market is a real industry. Demand sky-rockets based on hype alone, prices rising and falling within days. Last year, Christmas Ball tickets, originally 35 pounds, were being resold for values approaching one hundred pounds each. This phenome-non led to many May Ball tick-ets being sold at a loss a semes-ter later, as would-be profiteers flooded the market and drove the price down.

Prepare to queue: tips on getting a ticket

Hall BallsEvery hall hosts an annual Hall Ball which, as a Fresher, are not to be missed. Residents enjoy free tickets and for non residents it is usually around £10 – the cheapest ball you will ever go to. Depending on how organised your hall commit-tee is, what band is playing and where the ball is held, this can be one of the best nights of the year.

The Kate kennedy ballsAs a Fresher, you will probably be drawn to the Kate Kennedy Club Opening Ball and their May Ball like a mindless sheep. But if you go once, you might not want to go again. Opening Ball really doesn’t have much going for it, with little individuality. Held in the standard tent on Lower College Lawn, it may be one of the first balls of the year, but with hefty tickets prices,

you’re best to save your money for later.For May Ball, pray it hasn’t been raining or you will find yourself knee deep in mud as you ride the dodgems and eat your pink cotton candy. A bit hit and miss, it’s probably best to go once and decide for yourself on this one. Again, it is one of the most expensive balls to attend.

Charity ballsSt Andrews is really a rather charitable place and many events are held throughout the year to raise money for good causes. Big Top Ball is run by the Students’ Association’s charity campaign and – not surprisingly – has a circus theme. With performers, photo booths, tasty treats and a generally fun atmosphere, this is one to look out for. It usually happens in April.

Welly Ball is one of the most famous and popular balls in St Andrews at which wearing Hunter wellies is practically mandatory. Run in conjunction with the St Andrews Clay Pigeon Shooting Club, it is one of a limited number of balls which includes a sit down dinner. It acts as the after-party to the St Andrews Challenge, a clay pigeon shooting competition, and so half of the guests come from universities outside the Bubble. This is an infamously drunken night, held at one of St Andrews’ most popular ven-ues, Kinkell Byre.

Bongo Ball raises money for the Xavier Project and has an African theme. It is usually held in October.

Society run ballsNobel Ball is one of St Andrews’ smallest balls, run by the Scandinavian Society, and includes a sit down three-course meal and a ‘bubbly’ reception.

Glitter Ball is the Saints LGBT ball, held an-nually at the Old Course Hotel. With fantastic drag performances and more glitter than you can imagine, this sell out event is definitely not one to miss.

Christmas Ball, run by Mermaids (the Students’ Association’s drama society), is anoth-er one of the best balls out there. With a magical Christmas feel, it is a great way to celebrate the end of your first semester with your new friends before the torture of exams hits. You will have to put up with a ridiculously long queue for tick-ets, but that’s part of the experience.

And of course, The Saint hosts its own ball in week one. Held at the Old Course Hotel, it is one of the few St Andrews balls to include a ceilidh.Ill

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Past freshers tell allFormer Freshers talk about their own experiences

My Freshers’ week was definitely an experience. I’ll spare you the entire-ly gory details. It began as I was the first to move into my hall after the committee at 8 am. My father cried all the way there, cried as I put my stuff in my room and cried as I ran off to my work induction that started at 9 am. Emotional.

The rest of the week fades in and out in my memory. I remember a lot of drinking games. I remember being on the floor of my kitchen a lot. I remember carrying a lot of people home. Aren’t I a benevolent soul? I don’t remember the events, I don’t remember the music and I barely remember most of the people I encountered.

However, I got out of my Freshers’ Week what I really aimed to. I found my friends. I found a group of people who have stuck with me the past year. Some kind of warped, hilarious extended family. When I re-flect on my Freshers’ Week, it’s not really about the drinking (I mean it is, but whatever I’m being soulful), it’s about finding your friends, finding your feet and bracing yourself for the roller coaster of a year ahead. And so this year, I go back with my feet and my friends found, as we brace ourselves for what can only be another amazing year at St Andrews. Enjoy it guys, it’s a blast.

Bernie munro

Freshers’ Week is about finding your feet and bracing yourself for the

roller coaster of a year ahead.

Those who tell you that Freshers’ Week was the best week of their life are the same people who insist that they drink jagerbombs simply for the refined taste and will forever claim that that one time they ended up face down in their own chunder in a grungy alley off the Malia strip was the best night of the holiday. In reality Freshers’ Week is a painful and exhilaratingly awkward week of your life that there is no point in sugar-coating.

My own Freshers’ Week was an odd concoction of a seriously sprained ankle, two members of S-Club 7 completely unaware that they were middle aged and a permanent sugar buzz due to copious amounts of Koppaberg Cider (move on to the wine ASAP Freshers).

However, I think it’s the entirely tragic nature of Freshers’ Week that gives it an endearing quality: camaraderie develops as you neck Pablos whilst watching a comedian who’s not very funny; friendships bloom over the joint resolution to never ever go to Sinners again (a commitment I am adamant no one sticks to).

Freshers’ Week is a lot like sex. Your first will definitely not be your best, but it will always hold a special place in your heart. My main advice to keen young Freshers would be to not start week one feeling too under-whelmed; believe me, St Andrews’ night life does have slightly more to offer than blood-curdling ceilidhs and Jedward and you’ve got another three infinitely less stressful Freshers’ Weeks to go.

Beckie Thomas

My own Freshers’ Week was an odd concoction of a seriously sprained

ankle and a permanent sugar buzz.

I came into Freshers’ Week not knowing what to expect. I was nervous, excited and very well prepared. You could have asked me the date and time of any Freshers’ events and I would have been able to tell you. I didn’t want to miss anything. I’ve always been a bit of a planner and my first week of university was no different. I thought I had a pretty good idea of how it was going to go.

Needless to say my Freshers’ Week went nothing like I had originally planned. I didn’t go to half the events I had bought tickets for and I con-sumed much more alcohol than I had originally planned on. However, the complete unpredictability of the week is exactly what made it so spe-cial. Who knows if I would have met the same people or had the same wonderful experiences if I had chosen to stick to my ‘itinerary’ and not gone with the flow.

Freshers’ was one of the best weeks of my year, hands down. My advice to you incoming Freshers’ would be to not get too caught up in the details. Go out and do things you wouldn’t normally do - you never know who you may meet. Say yes to an invitation without thinking twice - you may learn something new about yourself. Good luck!

Mina Omar

My advice to you incoming Freshers would be to not get too

caught up in the details.Just accept that Freshers’ Week is an elaborate joke. Drunken students screaming over rythmless music in a desperate attempt to make friends, Americans uncomfortably ordering their first drinks from the Union bar and sweaty guys trying to flirt with an entire circle of girls all have co-medic value. Dismiss the cringe-worthiness of the entire situation and embrace the one week when, really, anything goes. Once you’ve appre-ciated the humour inherent to Freshers’ week, St Andrews becomes your playground.

I was forced to find humour in meeting my academic mother. I men-tioned to my friend that I was anxious I had not found an academic mum yet. In the middle of the packed Union, he stood up on a stool and be-gan screaming “academic mum wanted” and pointing at me as my face turned beet red. I was mortified. Luckily, a third year found the entire scene endearing and invited me to a party where I met my, now, academ-ic mother. I can not imagine a better mum than Sarah and am glad that I was forced out of my comfort zone.

The highlights of my Freshers’ Week included diving into the North Sea, whipping out dance moves usually reserved for my bedroom mirror and crashing a flat party with a group of people I had met minutes prior. Be spontaneous and take advantage of (almost) every opportunity. Most people won’t remember your name in the morning anyway.

Alison Quinn

Once you’ve appreciated the humour inherent to Freshers’ week, St Andrews

becomes your playground.

Freshers’ 20159

1. For those who think burger rhymes with heaven

I would wait until lunch for this one. Get some water, let your stomach settle and then soak up the excess with the pulled pork burger at Rascals. This may well have been the place that gave you your hangover, but at least it offers a solution too. It has historically offered incredible deals at the beginning of term, so be sure to pick up the vouchers they hand out as you wander around the town.

2. For the ones who actually get up for breakfast

North Point has a great selection of homemade pancakes, waffles and treats. See, things aren’t so bad after all! Good prices, good food, but one problem – the rest of St Andrews knows this too so you might have to fight for a seat. You won’t find it hard to find North Point though. They controversially advertise that Wills and Kate met there… for coffee.

5 foods to cure your hangoverJoshua Pooley prescribes the food to treat your Freshers’ Week hangover

3. For those that like a quick fix

Greggs is a stalwart of the British high street. It may divide opinion as to whether this a good or a bad thing, but its hard to care when your head is throbbing and they sell doughnuts. You can pick up some baked goods here, get some painkillers from Boots across the road and be back to your room having only seen five people you know – the current record for lowest unforeseen encounters in St Andrews. PS - don’t cite that.

4. For the honorary Italians

If your night goes the traditional St Andrews way, chances are that you ended your night with pizza at Dervish, Empire or Courtyard Café. Many of these people will want to skip this paragraph, as the thought of Dominos the day after may just be too much. Although overpriced, Dominos have a complimentary delivery service to your bed – almost. You can order your customised pizza online and have it to your hall door in no time. Good for those who want minimum human contact. Just make sure your neighbours don’t beat you to the door when the bell rings.

5. For the light eaters

If you would rather stick to water and a light lunch just like the doctor ordered then you are truly spoilt for choice. St Andrews is a haven for coffee shops. Pret A Manger is the most recent recognised name to join the scene, while Cottage Kitchen, Gorgeous and Rector’s café (to name a few) offer homemade food and a charming setting. Definitely head to Bell Street to try one of Gorgeous’ homemade giant scones with a cup of tea to cure any headache.

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Our town , our traditionsNews editor Joseph Cassidy takes you through St Andrews’ many weird and wonderful traditions which you can look forward to taking part in

The first tradition that all Freshers will experience is the academic families of St Andrews. Academic

families can be huge and far reaching, including but not limited to academic; aunts, uncles, nieces, nephews, husbands, wives and godchildren – however most begin with an academic mum,

dad, and their children. Families in St Andrews begin in the first few weeks of each year, when third years (second years in the case of medical students) will

usually approach first years they have met and ask if they wanted to be “adopted” and become their

academic children. Families serve as a means to let new students feel at home and give them a

source of support from older and more experienced students. Many families are the beginning of friendships that last

the entirety of a student’s time at university and sometimes beyond.

The norm is for a first year to have a set of academic parents before the next important St Andrews tradition – Raisin Weekend. This year held on 19 and 20 October, Raisin is one of the highlights of the year and gathers attention from across the UK’s media. Festivities begin on the Sunday morning, when children will meet at their academic mum’s house for a “tea

party” (usually involving games, ritual humiliation of first years and lots of alcohol) followed by a house party or pub crawl with their academic dad at night. The next day, first years are dressed in costumes by their mums (my entire academic family was the cast o f Toy Story in first year) and a “Raisin

Receipt” from their dads

(traditionally a Latin text, nowadays usually just a random and often cumbersome object), before congregating

in St Salvator’s Quad for a m a s s i v e f o a m fight – the m o s t

u n d e r r a t e d h a n g o v e r c u r e there is.

The role of the rector is one of the oldest positions in

Scotland, officially having been created in 1858. Today it exists only at the four ancient universities and Dundee. The rector is elected by students every three years and represents them at the highest levels of the University. To help stay in touch with the student body, the rector appoints a current student as rector’s assessor. The current rector is Labour MP Catherine Stihler who took on the role last November without an election after she was the only candidate nominated for the role. Her assessor is fourth year student Annie Newman. Previous rectors include the English philosopher John Stuart Mill, the authors J M Barrie and Rudyard Kipling, the philanthropist Andrew Carnegie and the comedian John Cleese.

Show off your new academic gown and take part in the weekly Sunday pier walk

with your friends! These pier walks remain popular amongst students all year.

The “PH” is a major St Andrews tradition, located on the cobblestones outside of St Salvator’s Quad. It commemorates the burning of Patrick Hamilton, a Protestant martyr, at the stake. It is said to be bad luck to step on the initials and that it will cause students to fail all their exams at the end of the year, the only way to reverse the effects being to take part in the May Dip. As a result of this, between classes, crowds of students can be seen parting to avoid stepping on it.

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Don’t stand on the PH

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Freshers’ 2015 10

Perhaps the most iconic of St Andrews’ traditions is our red academic gowns, worn by

undergraduates. They are gradually worn more loosely each year.

For first years, the gown is worn on both shoulders

to reflect your fledgling academic confidence.

As second years ease into their academic life, they throw their gown back, making sure to keep it on both shoulders.

For third years, cast your gown off your right shoulder if you’re a scientist (because science is always right) and off your left if an arts student (becuase arts are close to

the heart).

For fourth years the end is in sight and the real world will soon begin. Dangle your gown from both your elbows as you begin to shed your academic skin.

The Kate Kennedy Procession takes place in April and is another of St Andrews’ most iconic traditions. Organised by the Kate Kennedy Club, this spectacle sees students and locals alike dress up as notable characters from the history of the University and parade through the streets of St Andrews. This is a tradition which started in 1432, with only a brief interruption between 1859 and 1881 when the Principal at the time banned the procession, saying it was “a licentious and debauched affair.” Each year, a first year member of the Kate Kennedy Club is chosen to play Kate – the central figure of the procession – who rides in her coach (named Victoria) accompanied by the President of the club, who plays the part of her uncle Bishop James Kennedy.

In January 1800, stormy weather caused a ship to run aground just outside St Andrews. A student

named John Honey swam out and back multiple times, recuing the five sailors

on board but sustaining injuries than soon killed him. Current students honour John Honey’s heroic act each year with a torchlit p r o c e s s i o n known as the Gaudie. Donning gowns, you’ll begin outside Younger Hall and walk by the Castle to the end of the pier, from which floating lanterns will be released over East Sands.

Following the Gaudie, students stay up all night – usually drinking at parties – before gathering on East Sands at dawn on 1 May and running into the North Sea. This is the May Dip and it is the only way to cleanse yourself of academic sin. As well as stepping on the PH, academic incest is also counted as a sin strong enough to jeopardise your degree. Though the dip itself is surprisingly fun, the freezing walk back home is the only time of the year Albany Park becomes the most valuable property in St Andrews.

When fourth year students finish their final exam in May, their friends gather outside the exam hall to celebrate by throwing large buckets of water over them. Great fun! Though other more sinister

liquids are banned at official soaking sites like Sallies

lawn, students often embellish their water with glitter, making

soakings a festive sight.

The academic striptease

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Soakings7 Kate Kennedy Procession

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The Gaudie

The May Dip

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let's talk about

Agnes BlackadderDistance to town: Number of residents: Became a hall in: Royal residents: Hall spirit: Rent - single room (£)

1.28 km540

19930

2/106,207

Agnes Blackadder Hall was known as New Hall until October 2012 and many of the older students still refer to it by that name. It was renamed in the memory of the first female at the University after a vote by residents.

Andrew MelvilleDistance to town: Number of residents: Became a hall in: Royal residents: Hall spirit: Rent - single room catered (£)

1.52 km276

19600

9/105,365

Andrew Melville can be found on the North Haugh. It’s an interesting building that is known for both its ship-like structure, and the amount of pride shown by residents. It has one of the highest rates of returning students.

Albany ParkDistance to town: Number of residents: Became a hall in: Royal residents: Hall spirit: Rent - single room (£)

1.29 km333

19700

6/103,514

Albany Park is located about a 15 minute walk outside the town centre, but has the benefit of being right by East Sands. If you’re living here, you’ll be the envy of hundreds of freezing, wet students during the annual May Dip.

DRADistance to town: Number of residents: Became a hall in: Royal residents: Hall spirit: Rent - single room (£)

1.75 km1,1692004

07/10

6,177

David Russell Apartments, known as DRA, is the biggest and most diverse hall. Every student has an en-suite bathroom and access to the on site bar! However, be prepared for a healthy cardio regime - the walk to town is infamous.

Fife ParkDistance to town: Number of residents: Became a hall in: Royal residents: Hall spirit: Rent - single room (£)

2.04 km312

19600

6/106,177

Fife Park has been newly redeveloped for this academic year so it is now the most modern hall. It is the furthest accommodation from the town but each room has its own ensuite bathroom and each group of five rooms has a kitchen.

accommodation

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John Burnet HallDistance to town: Number of residents: Became a hall in: Royal residents: Hall spirit: Rent - single room catered (£)

0.85 km146

19650

8/106,150

John Burnet is the smallest undergrad hall and is split between the main building and an annexe. Although JBH is small, it more than makes up for its size with the close community it fosters in its residents. It is equidistant from both North Haugh and town.

St RegulusDistance to town: Number of residents: Became a hall in: Royal residents: Hall spirit: Rent - single room catered (£)

0.39 km176

19500

9/106,150

St Regulus, known as Regs, was named after St Regulus, who is said to have carried the relics of St Andrew to Fife. A relatively smaller and traditional hall, Regs residents and its Wardennial team boast of the informal “family” feel of the hall.

University HallDistance to town: Number of residents: Became a hall in: Royal residents: Hall spirit: Rent - single room catered (£)

1.02 km312

18960

10/106,207

University Hall, otherwise known as Uni Hall, is one of the most beautiful halls of residence. The hall is located close to town, the Univserity sports centre, and North Haugh. It was originally an all female residence.

St Salvator’sDistance to town: Number of residents: Became a hall in: Royal residents: Hall spirit: Rent - single room catered (£)

0.31 km191

19301

8/106,150

St Salvator’s, more commonly known as Sallies, is perhaps the most famous hall at the University. Sallies is known for being the hall that everyone wants to be in, as well as for its many traditions. It was the residence of Prince William and Kate Middleton in their first year.

Gannochy HouseDistance to town: Number of residents: Became a hall in: Royal residents: Hall spirit: Rent - single room catered (£)

0.25 km85

20140

n/a6,150

An annexe of Sallies, but infinitely less grand and imposing, Gannochy makes up for its lack of grandeur with more modern rooms and amenities, as well as retaining access to Sallies’ famous dining hall and the central location in the middle of town.

McIntoshDistance to town: Number of residents: Became a hall in: Royal residents: Hall spirit: Rent - single room catered (£)

0.46 km244

19210

9/106,150

McIntosh Hall is one of the most conveniently located halls at the University. It is located by the old union and has views overlooking both West Sands and the Old Course. Its surroundings make McIntosh one of the most scenic halls.

The classic Buzzfeed university list:

Chances are that once you got your A-level results and found out you were, in fact, successfully going on to university, you began to trawl through the internet for lists about what university life is like. The problem is that St Andrews is an incredibly unique place to go to university, so there are some

preconceived notions you will have to change in your mind once you’re here. In order to help, we decided to take a typically generic and obtusely optimistic Buzzfeed guide to university and re-write it for the St

Andrews experience.

The quotes haven’t changed, but the explanations REALLY have.

St Andrews Edition

Everywhere you go, someone wants to give you a discount on something.“ ”1.

Well, this is somewhat true. There are some good student offers and discount cards available from places such as Rocca, Rascals and Hams Hame, but on the whole there’s a decided dearth of deals about town. Be prepared to pay the same as everyone else in Dervish because they are almost all students as well, apart from the odd golfing stag-do group, all leering out of the window as they plunge their forks into their doner meat. There are deals about, but don’t expect a cheap night out unless you go to the Union.

You will find out what it’s like to live inside the library.“ ” 2.

Hold up. This is your first year. You have two or three more years to find out where the library is, so don’t bother yet. Besides have you seen that place? It’s a great, hulking, brutalist behemoth of a thing. Instead, spend your time at the picturesque Criterion or having bonfires at the beach. You’ll thank yourself when you’re trapped in the short loan section, pre-paring to mug a person who has the only copy of the book on 1760s Dominica you really need.

You are going to learn what a caffeine overdose feels like.“ ”3.

Again, don’t feel the need to overdo it. Ideally the only caffeine overdose you should be receiving as a Fresher is from Buckfast, in which case the caffeine is the least of your problems.

You’ll be so deep in your overdraft it will barely make a difference. Arrange to have at least one person back at home you can borrow money from. Friends and family have kinder interest rates than Wonga.com.

Look forward to going from poorto rich when your loan comes in.“ ” 4.

Freshers’ 2015 14

Your drinks cabinet will consist of WKD, Imperial Vodka and Frosty Jack’s.“ ” 5.

In fairness, you’ll need the first two to make your own Pablos (ask the Union today, forget the answer by tomorrow) but Frosty Jack’s is a terri-ble idea. I refer you again to Buckfast. Also remember that we try to stay classy in St Andrews, so the £2.99 Spanish Red in Tesco’s will do the job just as well.

You can look forward to tons of house parties.“ ”6.

When you come to St Andrews, you are going to be introduced to the joy of academic parents, who will basically give you a perfect introduction to the house party life. Although, a solid contact in DRA helps if you main-ly want to spend time with the people in your year. The only problem is that at many St Andrews house parties, you are more likely to find hum-mus and a fine Pinot in the kitchen than a short-notice rave palace set up in the garden. However, there’s still some fun to be had. Be sure to wan-der around the Badlands and listen out for the sound of breaking tables.

The halls of residence willbe crappy.“ ” 7.

Well, yes. But some of them are genuinely nice. Refer to the accommo-dation guide on pages 12 and 13 for a full breakdown, but most of them are really nice (apart from Agnes Blackadder, Andrew Melville and Lumsden Block of University Hall, which all look either like barracks or terrifying Bulgarian youth hostels.) Though even those are all good fun once you’re actually in them. Besides, despite the modern ones being the most ugly, they also have far better showers on the whole. And even the pretty halls actually look absolutely nothing like Hogwarts, no matter how hard you try to assure your friend back home that they do.

By: Viewpoint editor Tom Coombes

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The classic Buzzfeed university list:St Andrews Edition

You can look forward to tons of house parties.

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You may see some socialists.“ ”8.Well they are about. But frankly St Andrews is more Gieves and Hawkes than Hammer and Sickle. That said, there are a huge amount of political interest groups you can join in Freshers’ week, so if you have a burning passion for a particular political issue, there will be a group of people somewhere willing to hammer the table with their fists in assent after you speak.

Sometimes all you’ll beeating is toast.“ ” 9.

Well most of our halls are catered, so you’ll be getting used to a LOT of potatoes. For those of you who are self-catered it really will be a lot of toast for you. Let me just say this - if you are self-catered, don’t think you’ll come back from first year with the cooking abilities of Jamie Oliver. You will spend a lot of first year naked, but very little as a chef.

If you are lucky enough, you may get a new place to call home.“ ”10.Yes it is a place that is small and expensive, but it’s actually pretty great. I mean it’s damn beautiful, the sea is RIGHT THERE and there is more stuff to do than you would think. And, no matter how cheap your friend tells you the drinks are at Hull, it’s still a better place to call home. If you aren’t from the UK and therefore do not understand, living in Hull is a bit like being trapped in a tupperware box for eternity. St Andrews is a lot of things, and that is what makes it perfect. There is something here for everyone.

Overall, this Buzzfeed list was pretty useless to somebody first coming to St Andrews, but that’s okay. University is always a surprise and St Andrews is such a strange corner of the world that it’s proba-bly more of a surprise than most, though mostly a pleasant one. Sure you’ll get homesick and want

to escape the Bubble, but with so many ridiculous opportunities to make a fool of yourself with little to no repercussion other than a headache, it’s pretty much impossible not to have a laugh along the way.

So, welcome to St Andrews, but just remember; please don’t feed the seagulls.

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EVENING LANGUAGESNOW ACCEPTING BOOKINGS AT VARIOUS LEVELS

(INCLUDING BEGINNERS’ COURSES) FOR SEMESTER 1

ARABIC FRENCH CHINESE spanishGAELIC GERMAN ITALIAN Russian

JAPANESE PORTUGESE FOR DETAILS AND ENROLMENT FORM, VISIT

STANDREWS.ac.UK/STUDY/NON-DEGREE/EVENING LANGUAGES

Freshers’ 2015 16

7 things to expect from Saints sportsSports editor Charlie Wood gives you a taste of sporting life in the Bubble

1. It will rain, a lotThis is Scotland. And when you’re playing sport here, it will rain. It will pour. It might even hail. Heck, if anywhere puts the ‘rain’ in ‘training’, it’s St Andrews. But, deep down, you know that’s half the fun. Right?

2. Wednesday nights will be your new FridaysThe hierarchical nature of competitive sports clubs means that players don’t always have the chance to socialize with those beyond their spe-cific teams. So as most British Universities and Colleges Sport (BUCS) fixtures take place on Wednesday afternoons, Wednesday night is the optimum time to savour victory or shake off defeat with a whole-club social. Expect to see a shocking increase in your tolerance to alcohol.

3. You will get to see the whole of ScotlandSouth of the border, university sports teams compete on a strictly regional basis. For exam-ple, teams from London will (with one or two exceptions) never play teams from Manchester. But in Scotland, BUCS does not regionalize. Scotland is simply Scotland, in all its moun-tainous, multifarious glory. As a consequence, you’ll get to travel all around the country. Be it Aberdonian antics or Glaswegian glo-ry-hunting, sporting memories from all around Scotland are very much there for the making. Just try not to leave your kit bag in the chang-ing room after a 7-0 loss in Inverness like me.

4. You’ll need to train hardStudent sport is no jog in the park. The top tier teams train a lot. But of course, this only makes your successes all the sweeter and student sport is still just play after all. Even if it may not feel much like play when you’re at a 7 am training session on a freezing cold December morning.

5. Moving up in the ranks is possibleClub trials (held during Freshers’ Week) aren’t definitive. If anything, they simply mark the starting point of your sporting journey across the four years. Even if you are initially selected for a club’s sixth team, there is nothing stopping you progressing to the first team at a later stage. At the Football Club in 2013, one player actually pro-gressed from the fifth team to the first team in… wait for it… two-and-a-half months. Exceptional, for sure. But it is possible to progress on a ‘player pathway’, in Saints-Sport-speak. Better to get the jargon out the way early.

6. Thou shalt become a sinnerThere can be no light without darkness. There can be no good without evil. And there can be no Saints without Sinners. Call it what you want – a sporting spectacle, a St Andrean staple, a social on steroids (well, perhaps that last one’s not the best thing to call a sports-themed event) – Sinners is worth going to. For every winner; a sinner. For every heinous crime; a fantastic time etc., etc.

7. You will love itIn the final reckoning, it can hardly be over-stated: university sport is a whole different kettle of fish from sixth form or high school sport. In terms of intensity; in terms of time commitment; in terms of scale. And accord-ingly, the sense of unity and achievement that it fosters is quite simply invaluable. But the only way to properly understand this is to experience it first-hand. Only by joining a sports club, whether competitive or casual, can the awesomeness of student sport in St Andrews be truly comprehended. Honestly, you will have no regrets. Well, not unless you leave your kit in Inverness…

Give these a try!

ShintyThough most people have never heard of shinty, it is one of St Andrews’ most popular sports. It is a bit like hockey, except much more violent; players often wear helmets, mouth guards, junk protectors, and shin guards to protect themselves.

Ultimate FrisbeeA combination of the rules of American football and netball, players attempt to score points by passing the frisbee to a team mate inside the de-fensive end zone. During play, once a player has caught the frisbee they have ten seconds to pass it on. This is a mixed gender and non-contact sport.

KorfballKorfball is a Dutch mixed gender sport which contains elements of net-ball and basketball. The St Andrews team has won the Scottish league for three consecutive years. That’s pretty impressive!

Sub Aqua ClubIf you want to try something new at university, the diving club could be for you. Not only do they provide official training for new divers, but they also go on regular trips to dive sites around Scotland and abroad.

QuidditchThe St Andrews Snidgets are the University’s

muggle quidditch team complete with chasers, beaters, keepers and seekers - the perfect sport for any Harry Potter

fan. Players run with broom-sticks between their legs and

the golden snitch is a tennis ball in a sock tied to the back of the

snitch player’s shorts.

Can you name more than 60 sports? No? Well, in St Andrews, you can play them. Pick up a ‘Saints Sport’ booklet during the Freshers’ Fayre and feast your eyes on a sporting landscape as varied and dramatic as Fife itself. From football to shinty to taekwondo, the list is so extensive that those stu-dents who play some form of competitive sport in St Andrews actually make up a majority.

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dorm essentials you may not have thought to pack12

1. Flip flops

If you’re living in a hall with shared bathrooms, it can be a good idea to buy flip flops to pro-tect your feet. You will find cheap ones at either H&M or New Look.

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2. Pizza cutter

As a student, frozen pizza will become a staple of your diet. Pick up a pizza cutter from Tesco on your way to the chocolate isle.

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3. Drinking utensils

Tesco sells packs of fluorescent plastic shot glasses as well as plastic cups. Have some on hand for spur of the moment pre-drinks and parties, it’s better than having your guests drink out of your Winnie the Pooh mugs be-cause you only have two glasses. Also make sure you have a corkscrew bottle opener which again you’ll find at Tesco.

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4. Slippers

Invest in a hardy pair. You can wear these around hall without looking too strange and it’s comfier than putting on proper shoes for breakfast.

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5. Winter accessories

Scarfs. Gloves. Woolly hat. If you forgot these, or naively thought it would stay warm, buy some now. Welcome to Scotland.

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6. Laundry tools

At some point, you will have to face up to the facts and do your laundry. Since you’re only washing clothes for yourself, you might not have a big enough load to separate colours so invest in colour catcher sheets from Superdrug. You will also want a decent laundry basket from the hardware store at the top of South Street; the floor won’t do.

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7. Hangers

Coat hangers are a classic item to forget. If your clothes are currently crumpled at the bottom of your new wardrobe, pop over to Morrisons where they sell a pack of ten for £3.

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8. Extension lead

You most likely have multiple electronics, all of which need to be charged. Also, chances are, the outlets in your room will be in inconvenient places.

9. Earplugs

For when your hall mates or flatmates have ab-solutely no regard for the fact that you have an exam the next day.

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10. First aid kit

It’s better to have some paracetemol and ban-daids handy before you need them, rather than not have them the morning after a big night out. Find everything you’ll need at Boots!

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11. Trashcan with lid

All of your rooms will come equipped with trashcans, but they are most likely going to be open. If you want to avoid the smell, and the bugs that follow, do yourself a favour and in-vest in a can that shuts properly.

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12. Tupperware

If you’re going to be cooking for yourself this year and don’t plan on making something new for each meal, you’ll need a place to store your food. Anyway, even if you’re in a catered hall, it’s nice to have somewhere to store your biscuits.

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Freshers’ 2015 18

So you’re a student now. It’s time to start budgeting. Freshers’ week can be pricey, especially if you want to drink every night.

So here are some tips to help get you through the night (and the next day) with enough money left over to go back to The Vic.

Frankly, drinking in St Andrews is never going to be light on your wallet. Pre-drinks are crucial - buying alcohol from Morissons is much cheaper than buying drinks in bars. Once you head into town, you’ll find the cheapest drinks at the Main Bar in the Union. Another relatively cheap place to start your night is The Rule, which serves a pint for £3.10.

When it gets to the end of the night and you are hungry for some- thing non-al-coholic, there are three

c h e a p late night haunts all within a 40 meter r a n g e

of each o t h e r .

The first one (closest to the Union)

is Empire, which you will find in the alleyway on your way to The Vic. Probably best to stick to chips and cheese here. Next is Dervish on Bell Street. An actual restaurant during the day, Dervish turns into the ultimate pizza take away at

How to do Freshers’ Week on a budgetMoney editor Danielle Golds brings you top money saving tips for your first week

night. Finally, on Market Street, there’s Courtyard Café. Courtyard also offers pizza but the best option is definitely their toasties and paninis. Be warned however, they do not sell chips.

If you don’t live in a catered hall, there are a few places that offer lunch deals you can afford with whatever money you have left over from last night; provided you wake up in time. If you need a bit of a walk and some fresh air on your way then head straight to North Point at the end of North Street. They offer a quick lunch, which is half a sandwich and a bowl of the soup of the day. The Old Union Café (on North Street near the library) also sells cheap but decent food.

In case coffee is all you can handle Mitchell and Starbucks, both on Market Street, serve one of the cheapest cups of take away coffee in St

Andrews priced at £1.55. Finally if you just need a little space to breathe

and, crucially, not to drink then there are plenty of free activities around town. First, there are three beautiful beaches. Whether you just want to dig your toes in the sand or build a sandcastle with a friend, West Sands, Castle Sands and East Sands are all easily accessible and completely free. There is also Lade Braes walk, which is a public footpath that takes you about 1.5 miles on the route of an old mill as well as the Fife Coastal path, which is accessible from East Sands. The path, which stretches for 117 miles, takes you along the coast amongst beautiful wild flowers and offers gorgeous views of St Andrews and beyond. If you have a red gown, you can get into the castle for free and the Museum of the University of St Andrews (MUSA) on The Scores is also really interesting and completely free.

“If you need a little space to breathe, there are plenty of free activities around town.”

If you are interested in getting more involved with the theatre you can become a ‘Friend of the Byre’, a small annualfee to support the Byre’s activities in exchange for receiving theatre-based benefits. Please callus on 01334 475000 for more information or visit the friendsofthebyre Facebook page.

Interested in taking to the stage here at the Byre Theatre? Each semester we collaborate with the Mermaids performing arts fund and the Just So society to bring productions to our main stage. This semester we are delighted to be working with students on Equus, The Rocky Horror Picture Show and The Drowsy Chaperone!

As part of the Music Centre, we also host a range of concerts throughout the year. Enjoy weekly Wednesday lunchtime concerts for just £3, or find out more about the St Andrews Concert Series!

Looking to tread the boards in betweenthe student productions? Consider joining the the many local groups for music and theatre such as St Andrew’s Play Club or St Andrews Musical Society (SAMS), Guizards or ADAMS for your fill of theatre, just ask at Box-Office for details.

We have just launched our new brochure with a programme which runs until January 2016. Take a look online at www.byretheatre.com or pop in to see us on

Abbey Street to pick up a copy.