Ram Ay an 11

8/3/2019 Ram Ay an 11

http://slidepdf.com/reader/full/ram-ay-an-11 1/61

8/3/2019 Ram Ay an 11


1

8/3/2019 Ram Ay an 11


2

„RAM‟ayan…

Upon a time a Teen and a Queen.

(By Sai „ram‟)

These words aren‟t mean to achieve something but I

expressed my feelings to search, say, make feel,

and… the journey began.

8/3/2019 Ram Ay an 11


3

To

Myself…

My success, Parents, friends, love

And to everyone who not only passed in my life but

added essence to it.

Of course this Book is for the same who added.

8/3/2019 Ram Ay an 11


4 Just love everything

8/3/2019 Ram Ay an 11


5

Prologue

Some contexts of life are strongly imprinted on the

mind, uh…also the heart. I think, everyone thinks

themselves as unique like I do…

Because one will have their strange experiences,

interactions, interests…

And these three importantly leave imprints!

I am sincerely thanking the god for the gift of my

life… not more than my friends...not more than my

parents.

8/3/2019 Ram Ay an 11


6

And then …Dictionaries have different

meanings for this word Love. But when I think

about this word, my mind conjures up images of all

kinds of beautiful things that I have always

associated with this word. Flowers, chocolates,

candle light dinners, hearts, soft toys, clothes and

perfumes, these are the words that have become

synonymous with love…but, what about the

feelings and emotions associated with this word!

I don‟t remember that I had grown up with stars in

my eyes and love songs ringing through my ears.

Also I didn‟t even think that I have to be in

someone‟s trap, do you ever?

No I think. But, the day may come and you will

feel the essence of it.

Uhhh...that it was much more than material

comforts and gains.

8/3/2019 Ram Ay an 11


7

Love is more than being Stupid

And friendship…?

Both are immaterial… both gives the same divine

relation.

The value of these two relations…the happiness …

the trueness… the experiences in these

r elations…the sharing…the caring…the crying…

the everything... is unique, isn‟t it?

…it may be our country, parents, friends, relations

and you can guess the only thing I left!

Simply love is such an oecumenical word.

8/3/2019 Ram Ay an 11


8

EAMCET

May 10, 2009

Please check your OMR‟s according to your

hall-ticket numbers… make sure that you all get the

respective OMR‟s & pencils.

There we go, to sleep, actually it was EAMCET‟09

exam and all my thoughts are throwing me out of it,

still I managed to complete it by somehow and my

mind was thinking…thinking…thinking…

“Will I succeed? Did I deserve..?”

Don’t freaking think about that exam okay, I didn’t

mentioned that… it was nothing about that exam,

there is some other thing I want you to believe

okay…believe. Good.

“Will I succeed? Did I deserve? Today ends things,

actually a very lot of them”

…as it is not enough to aim, and you must have to

hit it. I‟m afraid that I didn‟t. At-least at the right

time.

I jumped out from the collecting bus around

2.00p.m, as all I pre-packed earlier night. Just I

8/3/2019 Ram Ay an 11


9

hugged a few of them and made sure that I had

everyone‟s contact details.

I ran out of my room and waited near parking lot.

I waited…waited…waited… till my brother got me

at around 6 on the evening, best of my

remembrance.

Not to say, that was a black cat!

8/3/2019 Ram Ay an 11


1 0

IN HOLIDAYS

I threw my luggage and bag aside as soon as

I reached home, had a sight of mom and my sister

and ran out to see my father to our Photo-studio

where he will be, I guess.

It was tucked between a Cement trading shop and a

Tea-Hotel. My father still follows the same old principles considering changes in people, business,

and technologies whatever!

He‟s good, actually too good to me.

The main header of our shop was beautifully

painted with a girl face smiling from side view, her eyes disclosing her fantasy. On the contrast with my

guess and totally letting out of it, the painting

grabbed so much attention than any other printed,

photoshop-ed typical banner which was my father‟s

idea which I thought totally as ridiculous.

I get in there, “Dad?”

“How you have done it?” my father asked about

EAMCET exam

“Forget about it dad, I did my worst!”

---

8/3/2019 Ram Ay an 11


1 1

And now you can imagine a parents anger whose

son himself saying that he was KO’ed. Sure, youdon’t dare, of -course.

A day or two passed, my dad didn‟t have a word

with me, but everything he asked with my mother-

“has he taken the lunch?”

---

It was not for the summer cold that night, I was

sitting for.

„Sai… Sai…‟ my mother was shouting and

searching for me. It‟s around 2 at night. I‟m sitting

on the stairs outside of our house.

My mother guessed me on stairs/stress. She

came and sat beside me.

I bet there is no love bad enough than that of

Mothers right? My mother broke into tears and

asked me deplorably.

“What happened my son? Why you are like

that? This is 4th

day…”

“…”

“Rey I‟m your mother and you can share

with me of-course, what‟s gone wrong.”

8/3/2019 Ram Ay an 11


1 2

“Come-on… We love you; say why you are

like that? ”

“A girl”, letting up the tears, I answered in a

wavering voice.

“Why can‟t you take her… like a friend?”

My mother uttered so woefully.

“…”

“We have many hopes on you, your father,

he always thinks about you. But why are you

doing this? We thought you were studying

there……”

“Amma, I didn‟t even have a single talk

with her, at least once! For gods sake.

Actually the girl is not from my section

too”.

She is from the first section and there is no

mistake of me or the girl in the case of studies

mom” I said in a tone blended with both grief and

anger (a little bit).

My mother remained silent for few minutes

“Then you had written all your exams well,

right? And you will get a rank?” she asked

8/3/2019 Ram Ay an 11


1 3

“Amma… may you people think that I am

an intelligent student from my progress reports. Butactually I‟m unable to mess up with those people

who will study 24 hrs. for their Goal. I didn‟t even

dreamed that studies will be like this mom.

Yes amma, I‟m too having dreams and aims,

and any who don‟t have?”

“Then?”

“No amma… I don‟t know the reason;

maybe I‟m not ready for these type of studies, so I

remained in myself for many months.

And I was in a stage that… I just forgotwhat I‟m there for? And what strain you are facing

to make me study and….and….and I was such a

moron that I left everything mom…

Actually I don‟t know that I‟m leaving

everything, and thinking that I‟m not getting

anything.

You know days passed just like that…

nearly a year.

All I have gained now because of that year

is missing of my worthwhile friends… studies…

fun… everything … (and even the girl, I might have

h b f )

8/3/2019 Ram Ay an 11


1 4

But I can‟t make you upset mom, I have

written them well, lot more than everyone‟s guess.Did u notice it‟s a contrast…… like, what I said I‟m

and in what way I have written them?”

Yes there is a change… and… I don‟t know

how. But I can definitely say why…and only

because of that girl.

(You know love is always constructive for

me. But why it comes without relations?

I don’t know her before…and I have never

talked with her after… but why I’m still feeling?)

“So what will you do know…? Do you haveany contact number or details?” my mother asked

weeping my tears with her sari

“No I don‟t have any. I didn‟t talk with her

till now as I said, but … I‟ll try amma. I‟ll… in

some way!”

“How?" Which place she is from?”

“Leave it amma… but don‟t tell to dad, I‟ll

try figure it out. She is from Adilabad.”

“And trust me, I won‟t do any wrong things

that may affect any of us to let down… sure amma.

8/3/2019 Ram Ay an 11


1 5

8/3/2019 Ram Ay an 11


1 6

Life is like a chocolate box…

And you never know what you‟re going to get…

8/3/2019 Ram Ay an 11


1 7

1st YEAR

I got one when my class 10th results are out.

Gained some confidence with them and

ready to become a scientist with it…

I listened that IIT‟s are the best institutions

offering Aerospace engineering and to get into them

I have to crack an exam, and your guess is right, it‟s

JEE!

So therefore, I‟m in for Raman Bhavan,

reputed as a premier institute in JEE coaching even

without a single pass out batch. (Somehow my

daddy figured out that campus)

Which is fairly a 22 km ride from my home-

town of course many say it is in Vijayawada and it

means my home was fairly close when compared to

the others who came even from North of the

country!.

And I‟m totally unaware that I was entering

into a competitive, challenging, tough, tangling

and… uh… perplexing world meant for the people

who are hard and smart.

And made a mistake then by writing the

entrance-screening exam of the institution in that

manner

8/3/2019 Ram Ay an 11


1 8

I got only 60 – 70 out of 120 in that

exam…and placed in „5‟

th

section in that college,that‟s what it is where form which it become

worthy.

Whatever, I got admission in the campus;

my parents came along with me and we managed to

get the necessary crap into the room.

„FJ-37‟ a printed paper was pasted outside the

room; I selected my bed and helped my mother in

arranging all things well. We talked a few words

before they leave like all… “Study well”, “eat

well”, “call regularly” etcetera along with all

possible precautions I can take.

Now it‟s about 1‟O clock, time for them to leave. I

came out of my room to say bye, I don‟t know that

I‟m sensitive enough to cry in the crowd when my

mother was leaving me but some people around are

thinking me as a poor guy and many are doing the

same.

“Anyway it’s not that much bad and it seemed to be

completely normal manner later!

I returned to room, laid on my bed reading some

magazine but thinking and questioning myself a

several times that it was real.

8/3/2019 Ram Ay an 11


1 9

It was J.C, Taller & wiser than me, on one side of

my bed and he was from j2 section.

We had a great little time with the books

which we thought as there will be enough time to

pass.

There comes, the first day of my rest of the life…

Uh… hostel life started… wake up at 5:30, awaited

bath, compromising breakfast and rushing to class

by 6(theoretically) and again…the same.

Moreover, days are passing so passively

spending time alone, mostly. I‟m bored of those

studies actually, the study hours, daily and weeklytests and all because I never expected them! (They

never keep daily tests to a scientist right..?)

Even though I don‟t even talk to them at

first much because of my shyness, my roommates

really, are very interesting and each person is an

eccentric I bet!

Chetan, my first quarrel started is with him

on a matter of an Rs.6, who used to be on the other

side of my bed.

A childish squabble included only the

sentence… “I‟ll pay.”…

8/3/2019 Ram Ay an 11


2 0

“Chetan…, the dhobi came let‟s go, first we

will take our clothes and then we will go to themess.”

“Ya, coming.”

We searched our clothes in a those long

rows of piles over a ten minutes and got ours,

Oh that‟s a great accomplishment because

probably more than one in ten didn‟t gets his

complete list in the same weekend.

Actually I‟m not having account for dhobi, I

used to send my clothes to home…but to give a try I

laid them in chetan‟s account after coming back toroom I gave him 6rs, cost of one pair.

And then all it started, he refused to take the

money and eventually it turned into shit!

Which kept us silent for each other, actually

that was the first and we used to do that very daymore than 18 months in our togetherness of 24.

As someone say-“Silences make the real

conversations between friends. Not the saying but

the never needing to say is what counts.”

Nevertheless, he is the friend who evencared me in hardest of all times.

8/3/2019 Ram Ay an 11


2 1

And I remember Sandeep used it to make

fun out of it, about both of us.

Those who can be happy without a cause

either have found the true meaning of it or have

gone stark raving mad. I don‟t understand what kind

of person is Sandeep, my other roommate in these

two things. But, I bet he never gets angry or he

never goes sad.

PS: In addition, there is one more specialty in him;

he eats very less food, only merely a 15 chapattis as

breakfast.

One more person of the essence is Harish,

but I don‟t want to tell about him more enough here.

“Let us be grateful to people who make us happy,

they are the charming gardeners who make our

souls blossom.”

---

8/3/2019 Ram Ay an 11


2 2

Days are passing … with less fun, less

friends, less study but more stupidity… withoutthinking about that for what I am here for…!

When I went for any relatives the only question I

can hear is “how are you studying?” And oh god,

how they encourage people to lie?

Nearly a year is going to finish, no change atall! You know I become poor in those studies more

precisely poor interested. Sometimes I wanted to

study but most of the times I can‟t.

I lost the screening test and again a one step back, a

large one. Now I was in 6th

section.

When they show up the results of any test, and my

friends got really something, I was happy for them

and you guess, even there‟s not a freaking thought

about me that what I got!

---

Things are going as harder as they can

Those were Dussehra holidays; I called home after a

day when I came back from the holidays.

“Hello! Amma, it‟s me!”

“Ya…, how are you?”

8/3/2019 Ram Ay an 11


2 3

“Why? What happened? Is there anything wrong

with your health?”

“Uh…no, I just wanted to come, but please

convince dad for some reason, please amma,

please… don‟t know why, but I cried in the phone”

My dad was very angry about that, even though I

was taken home. I never want to come back butafter 11 days I remember, I‟m forced to get back to

college and so now I‟m back with no change.

I had a surprise class next day – very bad indeed. In

the maths class Shyam sir rebuked me as I could not

answer even the simple question and it‟s not the

final one, it just became a wont to me.

They used to display marks and ranks of every

weekend exam, my results slipped out, now I‟m

around 5th position in my section from the bottom,

horrible isn‟t it? And for no reason I‟m doing this.

“See I can‟t buy you, what‟s the problem?”

Nagaraju my section coordinator said me.

“I‟m sorry sir, next time I‟ll improve for sure”, I

said without thinking. Of course I‟m telling this

from few weeks.

“ No you are not; this is not the first time, see if you

sleep ”

8/3/2019 Ram Ay an 11


2 4

“No sir, I won‟t sleep again much in the study

hours, I‟m sorry”

“I didn‟t mention anything, so don‟t you be awake

in the classroom at least?”

“Actually sir I‟m having a problem with my eyes

since we got eye-infection in our campus, I‟m

working on that sir, I‟ll do”, I know that’s a lot of soap, but you know at my wonder it worked.

I learned, I was ignored only because of my marks

in the tests. They will become everything you know,

of-course why not?

Our schedule is shifted from IIT to IPE (+2

syllabuses). Became more hard, study hours at 7:30

morning to 11:30 at night, no classes only fuckup.

It‟s almost January.

In one of those fine days, me and JC went out tocanteen for bondas(breakfast) during a break, by the

way he was promoted to the first section in the

screening test and he got a word about it, about new

staff, new friends, new people, old friends, girls

…etc.

“You see her?” JC asked me showing a girl.

8/3/2019 Ram Ay an 11


2 5

“Uh...a nice match for you, she was the section of

mine”

“Huh? So?”

“Nothing, same height as you, you can consider! :P”

“ Never mind :P” I said.

---

8/3/2019 Ram Ay an 11


8/3/2019 Ram Ay an 11


2 7

After so many days my heart was flying, probably I

have seen the most beautiful thing in these days,that was able to switch an unsung me.

I was already changed, that day for the first time I

went to play football (+) with my roommates, for

the first time even the freaking study hours passed

(+) in a blink.

From that day I was back at her, and I tried to grab

every opportunity to see her, in the mess, intervals,

class rooms, wherever!

I have done with IPE exams not so good, but

considerate. We are now rescheduled for IITJEE

and we had a screening test conducted again to filter

the aspirants‟ as-usually.

One more good news is I improved my section(+)

this time, but no matter everyone used to think all

the IIT ranks are for first three section students, and

AIEEE ranks are for last three sections and the we

middle ones are like standing on a wobbling plank.

May be the amount of improvement is not so good

in studies; I actually, personally improved in many

aspects (+). It‟s all the credit of her!

(I know, I know it sounds weird, but I can‟t explainit further now)

8/3/2019 Ram Ay an 11


2 8

I tried to find out the details of that girl, it took

about one week but finally I got them, name, placeand everything else I can. Her name was, Sre…

Our new room was amazing, may be mostly

because, my bed now is besides a window, through

which I can see her while she comes to mess.

I‟m happy now that there is very less chance of missing, but a rather disappointing one is my

friends of FJ-37 are sprinkled away.

FS-17 my new room, chetan, Sandeep and me

managed to be in a row.

We used to make fun a lot in classes, I shifted my bench from first to almost last with Sandeep but

chetan was more serious about studies and used to

sit with the same sapiens on the other side of the

class.

Our classes were more entertaining as never before

because now we had many things to do, paper

reading, pen-gaming, novels and bunking less of-

course because now we have a lot else‟s than

listening to them.

At the very moment the bell rings, I will be there at

my window peeking through it for my angel tocome. Of course there are some days only I have

8/3/2019 Ram Ay an 11


2 9

doesn‟t shows up. But as soon as I have sight I‟ll

start in my room which syncs me with her amoment before she arrives to mess.

No matter how worst the food is sometimes, who

cares? (+) I used to stay for as long as she leaves.

---

One day when I was in hurry after seeing her arrival

through the window, JC called me.

“Wait, Sai”

“Come fast” I yelled without looking back.

As usually I selected a place from where I can seeher, I used to sync my eating time with her

depending on what she eats.

“Still are you sure?!” JC tried to interrupt me.

“You mean?” “Why are you asking that again?”

“Nah, Never -mind” he said making a face.

“Hey, look she‟s leaving” JC said when my Angel

is still having the curd-rice.

“Who?”

“There, the yellow dress…”

8/3/2019 Ram Ay an 11


3 0

“At the door, see she went-out”

Now I can guess, why everyone acted like that

when I said about the „S‟. The girl JC showed me

that day was not the same girl I used to admire.

So „S‟ is the girl JC shown me, then who is that girl

I have seen?

After confirming with few servers, I came to know

that she is from first section, she is also a sort-of

„S‟.

I thought that each day was a special one at that

time, but when I‟m writing this I remembered those

days were routine but each day with differentredolence.

Days are running away like a wild horse…

Its February now, just one month is in between me

and the IIT-Ophidian i.e. in April, and IPE exams in

between.

Analyses, discussions, guessing works are already

started one-side and IPE seriousness started other.

Even though I have seen her umpteen times, I never

used a single one to talk with her, may be rejection

8/3/2019 Ram Ay an 11


3 1

enough or/and messing things up once and loosing

forever.

But this time I want to wish for her birthday, and

still I‟m having the same fear. So I thought of a

greeting which has none of my details and just

wishes.

I designed (+) one actually not one just three, on theouting week just before her birthday, one of it

contains.

“I would rather walk with you in dark

Than go alone in light

Sweet thoughts of you on this lovely day

Wishing and hoping things go your way

May you be blessed today or tomorrow?”

- “Thinking of you and all wonderful things

you say and do…” - Wishing you a very happy birthday :)

But giving it was the bungle-some task to me, how?

When? Where?

8/3/2019 Ram Ay an 11


3 2

February 21 2009

I came out of my room with the greetings around

00.30a.m; I left a note at the backside of one

greeting, with her name.

It was very dark outside in corridors, I can clearly

listen the silence, and the corridors are deserted. But

there were still some people doing night-outs inclassrooms. I was afraid as one of them can know

what I‟m doing.

I went straight to the girls study hour rooms, they

were locked. Panic is flowing through every vein

and my spine was chilled out. I opened the window

and slipped three greetings there in a flick and ran

straight to bed even without looking back.

And now I‟m awaited to see my birthday girl, I

woke up at 5.00.a.m and played badminton with

prakash and went to mess a 6.00.a.m, I waited till

7:30.a.m but no sign of her, same at the afternoon

and the evening too.

Usually at nights after the study-hours, we FJ37

friends used to gather and chew the fat till late, then

one of us said that she went out with her parents.

----

8/3/2019 Ram Ay an 11


3 3

Apart from her in second year, I have made a few

friends.

Lahir, GK, Pradhyumna, Manohar, Aditya (T),

Ravishankar, and Hemanth … a lot of course who

makes me smile when thinking the days with them.

It makes me remember that night in study rooms;

we had discussion on “who …eats more?”

FS-17 VS FS-15 (Sandeep VS GK)

It ran flew high until we ran out of food, the days

breakfast was punugu, their record was 82 almost

the bet was a tie because they are out of food, after

that, their bet still continued as we got extra foodfor other section people this time it was Bonda and

even it was finished too.

Really guys we did awesome then.

----

8/3/2019 Ram Ay an 11


3 4

March 5 2009

Second year IPE exams started, I wish we two will

have the same exam center, but god wasn‟t enough

good :(

I thought I was doing well, but I was affected with

flu and the last exams were the worst. Hardly left

15days before IIT

“ Accept that some days you are the pigeon, and

some days you are the statue.”

Everything was like a flow, till one day I asked

myself,

“What‟s after this? “What‟s after we leave this

campus? But I have more questions.

What if she goes into an IIT or NIT, and what was

then about me?”

Anyone can judge by my previous blot that I even

won‟t be capable of proper EAMCET rank.

I thought then as, I had no option, whatever

happens; I have to get admission in the same

college as she does.

Yes, I did that, sounds ridiculous? Of-course

sometimes emotions effect bad. Isn’t it such

8/3/2019 Ram Ay an 11


3 5

awkward that I didn’t even think how I will come to

know what college she takes and I decided to do.!

But I have no option rather than that. I gathered all

the resources whatever, I got up in some serious

action; I did my best to with those subjects.

We had a pilot test soon then, it worked! I stood

first this time, which I never expected to be, which Inever wished.

That was a real success to me (+)

I called my dad for the first time to share something

good I have done and…

Unexpectedly my mother picked up.

“Hello…”

“Hello, amma..?”

“Sai…”

“Where is dad?”

“He is fine”

“Daddy will not come tomorrow, I‟ll send the

worker to the college to pick you up, come home

tomorrow” I can sense something bad in her voice.

“A " Wh h d d d” I k d

8/3/2019 Ram Ay an 11


3 6

“Daddy was suffering with a clot in brain, he was

admitted in hospital”

“I want to talk to him mom, please”

“He can‟t talk Sai…, come here tomorrow”

“Amma …”

“Beep. Beep. Beep”

----

I finished my weekend exam as soon as possible;

our employee came to take me. Along all the way, I

keep on asking him about my father, but why hell

they are not telling me? :(

I was directly taken to hospital, at that time they

were shifting my father from ICU to a normal ward.

“What happened?” I asked my mother

“Work tensions…” she was unable to finish thesentence

“…doctors are saying that he needs a surgery and

recovery will be at a long time with loss of mental

performance and needs support of medicines for a

lifetime.” my uncle briefed me

After an hour, he opened his eyes and I was

8/3/2019 Ram Ay an 11


3 7

He was very happy to see me there and tried to sit

beside me, my mother helped him while I wasstaring at my dad. And every moment flashed for

me once.

“Daddy…how is you?”

He tried to talk, “Daddy this weekend I got first in

the pilot test”

It became the reason for his smile. He tried to say

that to my mom when she came in.

I stayed with him for the rest of the day. And

returned at evening

---

I entered the campus and I was walking towards my

room,

I was thinking about him, why it happened to him?

I recalled all that day, spent with my father. The

most unforgettable moment happened was when I

said him I got first in the pilot test.

“Itsss meee…” someone is shouting impatiently at

poor signal on phone. I turned. It‟s her, I smiled at

her being a reason for my dad‟s smile (Okay, okay

she didn‟t observed it of course.)

8/3/2019 Ram Ay an 11


3 8

Preparation didn‟t hold me back, it was the luck,

April 12 2009

I was waiting for my dad at the exam center after

our college bus has dropped us, people started

drifting in, and I paid for not listening to my dad‟s

words to wear a wrist watch. At-last I was the only

person outside of the exam center and still waiting because that was going to be the first time after I

met him in hospital.

Finally my dad came, and I rushed within a minute

after meeting him, my exam center was PVPSIT,

the exam center is nearly a km distance from the

gate. I ran at my potential in hurry.

Fuck, I forget to leave the bag outside and rushed

into exam hall, so again the hell I‟m supposed to

come back to the checkpoint and leave it there.

I came to known that I was 15min late by the clock

in exam hall, but the invigilator offered me some

forms to fill before the exam so I lost nearly 30 min

time, it threw me from pan into fire.

I begged invigilator at last moment to keep the

match-the-following type questions, already I have

done, but she snatched my life. Those weights 20-30, you can guess are worth. That‟s how 1st

paper

8/3/2019 Ram Ay an 11


3 9

I got lunch from home, this time I went in time and

I did well too.

But the only question was...how she written? If she

cracked it, then what will be I?

No one is there to tell me, how it happened

This day was the opening ceremony of our new

house but I managed to escape it, actually not it but

the questions of everyone about my exam.

---

Now it‟s time for AIEEE, i prepared well and time

to face it too…

April 26 2009

AIEEE, again for my luck it was the same center

and the same exam hall too. But this time all went

nice.

While solving the questions, the thoughts arechained one after other. Shyam sir‟s warnings,

friend‟s shortcuts, last moment revisions, previous

day relaxation everything, in between how is she

writing.

I did it wonderfully, and this spirit helped me to do

B.Arch. more wonderfully too.

8/3/2019 Ram Ay an 11


4 0

Again, the question how she did it. Hope I matched

her at least this time except if I forgot that she wasfrom 1

stsection and taking this course from 8

th

standard

After AIEEE we were relaxed, we got some

freedom.

---

One day I thought of giving a letter to her, precisely

her and not like before.

I wrote…

Good morning Pr…

414days (actually they were 377 at first but I

used to write it daily as I missed to give it the before

day)

414 days are completed till you made me

re born Pr…. May god bless you forever, I don‟t

know why but you seemed like a unique person.

In this 9936hrs of extolment, 596160

minutes and totally 40799600 seconds of time

passed in thoughts of you.

I promise on my honesty, you really elated

me and made my self-explored.

8/3/2019 Ram Ay an 11


4 1

We don‟t know each other before this course

of time, of course but even in this time you mademe feel blue that it‟s time to apart.

I want your presence in my course, aims and

life. I don‟t know what made me think like that but

just…

Simply may be because –“In search of you Idiscovered my higher self and invented a newer

self ”

- Thinking of you, and all wonderful

things you say and do.

- You‟ll be in my thoughts and prayers.

PS: nice taste of you (complimenting on her favorite

song Kabhi kabhi aditi… from Jaane tu ya Jaane

Na.)

But I have to give it to her straight. How?

Prakash came to me on that evening; he showed a

way to do that…

---

8/3/2019 Ram Ay an 11


8/3/2019 Ram Ay an 11


4 3

Actually, I have no enough guts and nuts… I was

scared; I got back to room immediately when I

heard about the plan.

We came again next day, this time prakash pushed

me hard.

I was first to go, I jumped to catch that ventilator

which is at 7 or 8ft height. After catching it prakash

helped me to get in. later he too came in.

Adrenaline is rushing; I walked silently to the door

which is on the other side of the room. While I took

out the wristwatch for light I started checking formthe door for my girls place.

I don‟t know whether to laugh or annoy for the hell

always happens to me, her chair was exactly below

the ventilator I have got down and I searched entire

room except the chair, I shouted prakash.

“I got her place!” (Actually I forgot the conditions I

was in)

“Shhhh……” he warned me.

Her writing was good, round and straight up the

way she kept things, the way she maintained thenotes, I observed them. There was a daily test paper

8/3/2019 Ram Ay an 11


4 4

I spent there a few minutes and returned back to

room. After that I remembered that I have to giveher a letter, shit I missed to give the letter, again.

Next day I wrote that letter again recounting all the

above calculations and kept that letter in one of her

books.

The next day, next day, the next… they went and I

used to go very often. Slowly I lost my fear even

though I got some bruises.

Till the end, I collected a one-rupee coin, daily test

papers, rough works she done during tests, a ball point pen, inorganic chemistry notes, and one day

she forgot her dupatta there.(Sorry for her if she

gets angry on reading this )

We have to leave our hostels after completing our

EAMCET exam, days were reducing and tension

was building up in me.

So I decided to talk with her after we come from the

EAMCET exam,

----

8/3/2019 Ram Ay an 11


4 5

May 10 2009

That was EAMCET; it went as I said first. A dark

black cat.

8/3/2019 Ram Ay an 11


4 6

WRONG TURN

It felt relieved after talking with my mother, nearly

15 days passed after EAMCET and I was waiting

for IIT results as they are going to come tomorrow,

my dad called me.

“What are you expecting tomorrow?”

I said nothing but “… „Results?‟ ”.

The most timidest time was it when I was supposed

to answer that.

Next day morning at 7:30a.m. I was before the

computer, my brother is with me.

I entered my HTNO. after a second or two of my

click it loaded:

The very next thought I was thinking, is about her

after I bawled out myself. How did she have done

that? I missed her JEE Hal ticket number, so I don‟t

know her rank but later someone said me that shegot a good rank but waiting for AIEEE results I‟m

8/3/2019 Ram Ay an 11


4 7

But my dad was very worried by the results; of

course I‟m responsible for that.

AIEEE results also are not so far too, they will also

be in a week.

Between, we planned a reunion of our roommates.

We had a great time then, we spent most of the time

in Raman Bhavan. Actually we came there for our original certificates and thought she too will come

but not for my good.

---

At one evening I was watching Cedric and Chen on

TV; my dad just came in and asked me

“When were the AIEEE results?”

“Tomorrow” I spoke very dryly

“Oh…great, I think they were leaked!” showing the

printout of my result. He said.

You see? He was happy, yes!

“Whoa….. :)” I was good (not good but great), but

did I reached her?

Immediately I rushed out for her result and

WowWwW... I was close to her rank too eventhough she got more than me

8/3/2019 Ram Ay an 11


4 8

That‟s what I waited all these days for, I tried for, I

dreamt for. Really I did an unbelievable thing for anyone. All happies, especially my dad he was very

happy. Thank you god, I said myself.

No, but not me, not happy even this time, not even

for a day.

---

Now!

Ya, what’s i am now? well…

It wasn‟t bad enough to join in a local engineering

college (!). After completing all the above good

shit.

---

“When you bite into a chocolate truffle, you don't

want to find oat bran.”

Within in an hour I prepared all the options for thecounseling which are having high probability of her

choice. First preference will be Electronics branch

and next, as a girl a place nearer to her and the

second ones are aerospace a mechanical branches in

same colleges.

8/3/2019 Ram Ay an 11


4 9

But… After listening that she opted for long-term

coaching, I don‟t know how to convince my dad for taking long-term, rejecting this rank.

Now I have to drop my AIEEE seat and have to be

ready to do the same, for which I fought down all

these days for. But to my goodness he wasn‟t

enough upset when I said I‟ll go for long-term.

That day I went to my college with my dad for the

admission in long-term coaching, I got heavy

discount for my AIEEE rank, all done and in a week

I planned to attend the classes.

8/3/2019 Ram Ay an 11


5 0

After coming home, I wanted to know how close I

guessed her options. I tried to open her account as Iknow all her details and only because I thought that

she opted for long-term coaching,

After logging in I had seen a message.

“Your preference Sardar Vallabhaipatel National

Institute of Technology, Surat is allotted in sixthround of counseling.

Please confirm your allotment before the

seventh……

After reading that…huuunh….

But…but…no… I have already cancelled my seat.

What I have done? Ohhhh… what to do now?

Of course there are only two options to me now.

One is to continue in long term and the other one is

to go for Spot admissions using EAMCET rank.

I thought the second one is better and it took me 4

days to convince my dad again for continuing

B.Tech..

Now she is in NIT, Surat and I‟m in NIT

Vijayawada ;)

8/3/2019 Ram Ay an 11


8/3/2019 Ram Ay an 11


8/3/2019 Ram Ay an 11


5 3

Everything around me changed, everything in me

changed, everything… except you my little angel pr….

I have waited for her as months passed hoping that

one day she will come Vijayawada.

---

One day I was telling my friend that -“I think in this

May she will come Vijayawada”

Then she asked me- “When will you propose to her

Gundu, you killed a lot of time by now?”

“Hmmm… but it‟s not the matter of that ra, she

even doesn‟t know me that a person like me exists,

then how can any girl accept that?”

“Then?”

“I…I want to write a book”

“Huh…?”

“Yes, I want to write a book. This can tell the story

to her.”

“Good idea, gundu. All the best”

“Hmmm…best.”

8/3/2019 Ram Ay an 11


5 4

Feb 21 2010

Ramayan started then,

“ No this is not good, I have to rewrite it again”- I

said this many times to me when I was writing.

I never thought that book writing is this much

difficult.

Then I began to read some similar fiction books to

observe the sentences, descriptions and dialogues.

Finally I completed writing and I want a digital

copy of this book before going to publishers. So I

decided to type the whole book this evening.

But when I got some NCC work to attend, so I

directly went there from college. In the bus I forgot

my college bag along book.

I used every possible step to get that bag back, but

one week passed and no track of it.

I got a call from a stranger one day, reporting that

bag is with him, I recovered the bag, saying a

thousand thanks to him.

As I completed typing, I got only twelve ugly pages

of scrap. I failed.

I‟m not a good writer then how can I do that? How

8/3/2019 Ram Ay an 11


5 5

I restarted after few months I tried this time hard. It

took long time to complete. I Shifted target dates asmany times I listen her coming and then knowing

that she will not.

One and half year passed, I just only listened about

her all the times. All I did is just keep checking her

GPA every semester.

Now the book is with me, but waiting for the right

time.

There came an opportunity. I came to know that she

was coming Andhra Pradesh for industrial training

in BHEL (HYD).

I too applied for it along with KLU students, Gopi

and Jayakiran. We fixed our dates around from 11th

May to 11th

June. I was dying to see her.

---

8/3/2019 Ram Ay an 11


5 6

IN HYDERABAD

We used to stay in VR1 HOME in Mehdipatnam.

From first day onwards my industrial training

started by searching her.

10 days passed, no sight of her, 15 days still no.

then I got that like all things I have planned

listening about her, this one is also a shit.

I got frustrated and immediately I returned to

Vijayawada on that day itself. After a week, Gopi

called me to come back for taking certificates of

that training.

I went 4 days before our last day of training. Assoon as I arrived in Hyderabad I got a call from my

inter-classmate that he has seen an angel in BHEL.

Next day I went to BHEL, me and Gopi were

searching for her and we searched every nook and

corner but again disappointment. We stopped

searching and ready to leave around 2.00.p.m.

There happened the magic. whooo. I can see her

from distance; uncontrollably I danced on the road.

After nearly 2 years I have seen her, I was so happy,

sooo… happy.

She is in blue jeans and wore a full hands smoky-

black Tee She doesn‟t changed m ch; the onl

8/3/2019 Ram Ay an 11


5 7

I followed her out. And unbelievably we shared a

common auto. Actually it happened like that.

Next two days it went similarly, but the third day,

when I thought to talk with her (fuck the luck), I

didn‟t find her, and from fourth day we were thrown

out from the BHEL after completing training and

now we have expired passes to access the area.

…And now I was back with this book, again to…

8/3/2019 Ram Ay an 11


5 8

…To know, what it kept me waiting from 4 years.

May be the walk. May be the simplicity. May be it

is the you one who made me smile whenever I lost.

Maybe you are the most beautiful girl I have seen.

May be there is no one so special as you.

So, after gathering courage to write a few lines…

I started Ramayan. About me as a teen upon a time

and to you my queen. Because you are the story,

that I don't want to have an end for it.

And if I caused any distress to you in this, my

sincere apologies to you.

You have answered every of my questions, from

then to now.

I‟ve never been so sure of anything else in my life

as I ask you the question: Will you be my Girl?

---

8/3/2019 Ram Ay an 11


5 9

Have you ever tried of becoming a prime minister?

spent a „full‟ day eco-friendly?

Nothing, you should try. You read my book

completely already.

…

With faith.

Sairam Sunkara

[email protected]

8/3/2019 Ram Ay an 11


Documents

Ram Ay an 11