7 Advanced Writing Techniques

to Make Your Blog a Smashing Success

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Sturgeon's Law:95% of everything

is crap.— Theodore Sturgeon

"Write good content" is

stupid advice

The Basics

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•Use active voice; passive voice is to be avoided.

•Short words. Short sentences. Short paragraphs.

•No infinitives/gerunds (also called "future continuous").

•Subject & verb at beginning of the sentence.

1. Write good ledes.(Write like a journalist,

not a teenager in her diary.)

@edeckersA "lede" is the opening paragraph in a newspaper article. It was originally spelled "lead" (and pronounced "leed"), but in order not to confuse it with the pieces of lead ("led") type, they started calling it the "lede" instead.

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"He coulda beena credenza."

— David Knowles, The Daily

•Webster's defines "mediocre" as. . .

•If you've been living under a rock. . .

•My friend, Steve, and I were at our favorite coffee shop, drinking soy chai lattes. . .

•Take 2 parts "blah," and 3 parts "meh," and mix them up to create the worst ledes ever.

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These kill kittens!

2. Metaphors rule.(Similes will do in a pinch.)

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Men's words are bullets, that their enemies take up and make use of against them. — George Savile, Maxims of State

Life is like a box of chocolates. — Forrest Gump

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Tom Waits

And the impending squint of first light

It lurked behind a weepin’ marquee in downtown Putnam

It’d be pullin’ up any minute now

Just like a bastard amber Velveeta yellow cab on a rainy corner

And be blowin’ its horn in every window in town— Tom Waits, Nighthawks at the Diner, "Putnam County"

My favorite Tom Waits album is "Nighthawks at the Diner," and one of my favorite songs is "Putnam County." This particular part of the song is about the sunrise, and I love how he equates the mean light of the morning sun to an obnoxious taxi cab.

3. Use Powerful Words

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Stephen Fry

@edeckersStephen Fry did a special one-on-one interview with Craig Ferguson, and he discussed the appropriateness and inappropriateness of using words like "kill," "torture," and "fuck." You can see it here. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ntrSnMPr2X4

Kill,Torture

Fuck@edeckers

4. Eliminate adjectivesand adverbs.

(Especially adverbs.)

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5. Eliminateall the

Needless Wordsin your work

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Use the BEST Words

Iceberg Theory

"For sale. Baby shoes. Never used."

6. Your English Teacher Is Not a Writer

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If proper usage getsin the way, it mayhave to go.

I can’t allow what welearned in Englishcomposition todisrupt thesound and rhythmof the narrative.

Elmore Leonard

Robert LowthRobert Lowth was a 17th century Latin scholar who decided that "do not split infinitives" was a rule, based on the notion that in Latin, there are no two word infinitives — to run, to go, to eat. Since it was impossible to split them in Latin, he said we couldn't split them in English. It should never have been a rule. It was the same for prepositions at the end of a sentence: "you can't do it in Latin, you shouldn't do it in English." Except that should never have been a rule either. http://problogservice.com/2009/11/11/five-grammar-myths-exploded/

• Split infinitives boldly• End sentences with prepositions• Start sentences with And, But, Or

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7. Write 3 – 5 good ledes.String them together.

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Hunter S. Thompson would often write 3 – 5 solid lede-worthy sentences, string them together, and beat the reader with them, BAP BAP BAP! He didn't do it all the time, and he would sometimes do it in the middle of a story. It was forceful and dramatic, and made the reader pay attention. That's what an opening lede should do, so imagine the power it had when it appeared elsewhere.

We were somewhere around Barstow on the edge of the desert when the drugs began to take hold.

I remember saying something like, "I feel a bit lightheaded; maybe you should drive . . ."

And suddenly there was a terrible roar all around us and the sky was full of what looked like huge bats, all swooping and screeching and diving around the car, which was going about 100 miles an hour with the top down to Las Vegas.

And a voice was screaming: "Holy Jesus! What are these goddamn animals?"

@edeckers— HST, Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas

Bonus:"Write Drunk. Edit Sober."

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While Hemingway was known for his roaring drunkenness, he never actually wrote drunk. No matter what he did the night before, he was up and writing by 6 am every day. He wrote until noon, then he edited his work, wrote letters, and THEN got drunk. He wanted us to write as if we had been drinking — alcohol depresses our filters and blocks, which keep us from saying silly and/or truthful things. He encouraged us to tell the truth as if we were drunk, but then to edit as if we were sober. Not to knock the edges off or to take out the honesty. No, that had to stay. Rather, fix it and make it better, but never remove the truth.

Any Questions?

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