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It’s a given that much of our success as practitioners depends on our ability to foster meaningful relationships with our colleagues and customers. But what about our relationship with ourselves? When we ignore our emotions, act against our values, and become indifferent to our surroundings, we lose who we really are and run a much greater risk of not achieving our clients’ goals (and our own). In this talk, we'll explore how presence, adaptability, empathy, and influence can be our most effective design tools. And we'll address how to cultivate these qualities through intellectual, emotional, and physical practices we can integrate into our everyday routines.
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մեeIntegral Designer:Developing YouWhitney Hess [email protected] whitneyhess.com @whitneyhess
from superhero to zero
What does it take to be
integral?
Self-Awareness Social Awareness
Self-Management Relationship Mgmt
Social + Emotional Intelligence
Self-Awareness Social Awareness
Self-Management Relationship Mgmt
Social + Emotional Intelligence
Self-Awareness• Emotional Self-Awareness• Accurate Self-Assessment• Self-Confidence
Social Awareness• Empathy• Organizational Awareness• Service Orientation
Self-Management• Emotional Self-Regulation• Transparency• Adaptability• Achievement Orientation• Initiative• Optimism
Relationship Mgmt• Developing Others• Inspirational Leadership• Change Catalyst• Influence• Conflict Management• Teamwork & Collaboration
Social + Emotional Intelligence
What am I missing?
My SEI Profile (early 2013)
My SEI Profile (early 2013)
Mind
Heart
Body
Mind
Heart
Body
Most workplaces
Mind
Heart
Body
մեink
Feel
Sense
Mind
Heart
Body
մեink
Feel
Sense
Cognitive
Emotional
Somatic
Integration
http://www.pnas.org/content/111/2/646
Neuroplasticity!
Self-Awareness
Self-Management Relationship Mgmt
Social Awareness
Self-Awareness
Self-Management Relationship Mgmt
Social Awareness
Presence Empathy
InfluenceAdaptability
Self-Awareness
Presence
մեose struggling with presence:
☐Get distracted easily ☐Have overactive mental chatter
☐Find themselves easily irritated
☐Treat people abrasively without realizing it
☐Feel imbalance in their work life, health and family
☐Feel unexplained aches and pains
մեe Oblivious Applicant(a story)
Benefits of presence:
✓Greater awareness and understanding of your own feelings and emotions
✓ Easier to focus on the task at hand
✓Heightened experiences and stronger memories
✓ Peacefulness and inner stillness
✓ Connection to your personal truth
Developing your presence
1. Write morning pages
2. Observe your thoughts
3. Pause and breathe
Self-Management
Adaptability
մեose struggling with adaptability:
☐Find it hard to juggle demands
☐Get frustrated by change — even when positive
☐Find changing priorities stressful
☐Slow to see things from another perspective
When Development is Done(a story)
Adaptability =
FlexibilityAttitude
VersatilityAptitude
from Dr. Michael O'Connor and Dr. Tony Alessandra’s մեe Platinum Rule
• Confidence
• Tolerance
• Empathy
• Positiveness
• Respect
• Resilience
• Vision
• Attentiveness
• Competence
• Self-correction
+
Benefits of adaptability:
✓Know how to negotiate agreements so that everyone wins
✓ Accept surprises whenever they arise
✓ Able to generate alternative solutions
Developing your adaptability
1. Brainstorm alternatives
2. Observe your reactions to change
3. մեrow away old work
Social Awareness
Empathy
մեose struggling with empathy:
☐Assume they know how the other person feels
☐Believe everyone thinks like they do
☐Wait for their turn to talk, planning their response
☐Have a hard time “reading” people
☐Are oen surprised by what someone has said or done
BlahBlahBlah(a story)
#1 Job Skill in 2020
Five Levels of Listening:
1. Ignoring
2. Pretending
3. Selective
4. Active
5. Empathic
from Stephen Covey’s մեe 7 Habits of Highly Effective People
Benefits of empathy:
✓More accurately read people’s moods and non-verbal cues
✓Respect and relate well to people of diverse backgrounds
✓Understand how others’ perspectives differ from your own
✓ Better predict others’ reactions
✓More effectively serve their needs
Developing your empathy
1. Assess your level of listening
2. Watch for cues
3. Read more literary fiction
Relationship Mgmt
Influence
մեose struggling with influence:
☐Take little notice of audience’s needs or interests
☐Deliver same argument or presentation regardless of audience
☐Rely on their position of authority, or are resigned to having not having any
☐Find it hard to communicate a common vision that involves others
մեe Incredible Hulk(a story)
Principles of Persuasion:
1. Reciprocity 2. Consistency 3. Social Proof 4. Liking 5. Authority 6. Scarcity
from Dr. Robert Cialdini’s Influence: մեe Psychology of Persuasion
http://www.scn.ucla.edu/pdf/BuzzSA72013.pdf
մեe Salesperson Effect
Benefits of influence:
✓ Build consensus and support for ideas ✓ Appeal to others’
self-interest
✓ Adapt your approach by anticipating people’s responses
✓ Turn others into evangelists
Developing your influence
1. Consider your available strategies
2. Observe an influencer
3. Be a helper and accept thank you
Self-Awareness
Self-Management Relationship Mgmt
Social Awareness
Presence Empathy
InfluenceAdaptability
Corporate Mindfulness
• Google’s Search Inside Yourself
• Awake@Intel
• Meditation at Medium
• Salesforce.com meditating CEO
• SAP’s Mindfulness Program
What would it be like if I had more _________?
What kind of invitation am I to others?
What do I need to do to be
integral?
Plot Your Course — personal development coachinghttp://whitneyhess.com/plot
Learn մեe Ropes — user experience career coachinghttp://whitneyhess.com/learn
Take մեe Helm — UX leadership coachinghttp://whitneyhess.com/helm
Run a Tight Ship — product strategy workshopshttp://whitneyhess.com/ship
20% discount on all programs when you mention Slideshare
Other Resources
Booksմեe Intuitive Body, Difficult Conversations, Daniel Goleman’s Emotional Intelligence, մեe Power of Now
ToolsOprah & Chopra, Headspace, Li app, Insight Timer
ProgramsSearch Inside Yourself Leadership Institute, Wisdom 2.0, Mindfulness-Based Stress Reduction, HayGroup’s Emotional & Social Competency Inventory
