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Designing Rites of
Passage for BoysBy Robert Neuenschwander
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Current Problem
Few (if any) true initiations into adulthood areactive in the West
Ones that remain are Small
Ineffective
Limited to closed groups
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World Without Rites
Solid sense of adult identity needed for a healthy society
Absent rites cause
Diffuse ritualization Knowledge gained from any available source
Peer initiation
Unconscious self-initiation
This leads to Distorted self-images
Violence
Lack of vocational direction
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What is a Rite?
Ronald L. Grimes - While rites-of-passageprograms are partly intended to build self-esteem,
they also focus on practical matters that can be achallenge to young men and women. Instruction isoften provided in topics such as financialmanagement, sex education, nutrition, personalhygiene, and decision making.
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Remaining Rites
Religious Baptism, confirmation, bar mitzvah, christenings, firstcommunion (often occurring at a younger age), visionquest
Group Graduation (high school, college), completion of BoyScouts, athletics and sports, military
Personal - Teen Quinceaera / Sweet Sixteen / major birthday,start/end of puberty, dbutante balls
Personal 18+ Moving out of home, first major job, marriage
Negative Gang initiation, hazing, random risk taking
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Anatomy of a Rite
Part 1 Separation A focused detachment from a previous way of living Cutting away of childish actions and beliefs
Part 2 Transition Longest/most intense phase Learning about life, responsibilities, work with mentors
Part 3 Ceremony/Incorporation A public declaration that rites test have been completed New adult is ready to be a full adult member in the
community This is the main (and mostly remaining) focus in modern
West
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Constructing A Rite
When is it time?
Often around the onset of puberty
Are you making these statements or questions? I want more out of my life.
I am struggling with issues or problems I do not know howto solve. I do not even know if there IS an answer.
I do not like the way the men I see act and I want to find a
way to be different. I would like to have a place where I can be totally myself
and be respected for it.
I want to be a leader.
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Rite Teachers
Boy is provided with anumber of successful andpowerful mentors, well-
known community leaders
Some adult womeninvolved in the beginning,mostly men at the end
Mentors becomeresponsible for characterdevelopment
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Rite Tests
Boy is provided with ongoing challenges
Physical
Constructing, exploring, adventure into the unknown
Being a man involves work and effort
Mental
Puzzles and situations where thought is neededbefore action
Being a man involves wisdom and foresight
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Rites with Heart
Emotion-laden challenges
Though with a guide
Often a mentor that hasbonded with the boy
Mentor there to provideencouragement and on-the-spot insights
Emotions/values to face:fear, grief, empathy, love,valor, courage, honor,sacrifice, peace
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Rites Involve Groups
Not a solo act
Rites take place in groups
Trusted set of brothers-in-arms
Someone to lean on, goingthrough same experience
Later ability to recognize
who has passed rites tests
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Secret Knowledge
Traditions/instructions are passed down
Family, community, religious
The roles of a successful man:
Community leader
How to add value to his home and neighbors
Husband
How to relate to women
Father
How to raise sons properly
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Names
Boy is given or decides on anew name
Mikey becomes Mike
Bob becomes Robert
Childhood nicknames aredropped
Part of discarding the boy
New identity to confirmnew role
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Victories
Boy earns physicalrepresentations of hissuccesses
A reminder of a test beingpassed
Emblem, badge, item fromthe test itself
Example Boy Scout
badges
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Rite Completion
A community ceremony, where boy is judged andencouraged by parents and mentors
Young man makes a public declaration of: Who he is
What he seeks
His goal in life / what he has to offer the world
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Post-Rite
When the rites are done,they are done
Boy joins the men as anequal and is treated as such
New man can now
Build his own home
Find a wife Raise a family
Add his voice tocommunity discussions
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Rite Impact
If rites of passage are emphasized, the result will be:
Men who can define their role in life
Men who know who they are and where they aregoing in life
Men who are independent but can still acceptguidance from elders
Men who can properly relate to women
Men who are fit and prepared to raise children
Men willing to pass on their knowledge to the nextgeneration
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Current Models
The following websites are some of theorganizations attempting to revive modern rites ofpassage:
http://www.aliveadventures.com/
http://www.ritesofpassagevisionquest.org/
http://www.thecornerstonespath.com/ http://www.thresholdpassages.org/
http://www.ymaw.com/
http://www.aliveadventures.com/http://www.ritesofpassagevisionquest.org/http://www.thecornerstonespath.com/http://www.thresholdpassages.org/http://www.ymaw.com/http://www.ymaw.com/http://www.ymaw.com/http://www.thresholdpassages.org/http://www.thresholdpassages.org/http://www.thecornerstonespath.com/http://www.ritesofpassagevisionquest.org/http://www.ritesofpassagevisionquest.org/http://www.ritesofpassagevisionquest.org/http://www.aliveadventures.com/http://www.aliveadventures.com/8/4/2019 Neuenschwander - Rites
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Works Consulted
Crossroads: the quest for contemporary rites of passage. (1996).Open Court: Chicago.
Grimes, R. (2000). Deeply into the bone: re-inventing rites of
passage. University of California Press: Berkeley.
Gurian, M. (2009). The Purpose of boys. Jossey-Bass: SanFrancisco.
Hill, J. and Daniels, P. (2008). Life events and rites of passage.Omnigraphics: Detroit.
Lewis, R. (2007). Raising a modern day knight. Tyndale HousePublishers: Carol Stream, IL.
Websites on previous page also consulted.