Etiquette and mannerisms

Rules governing socially acceptable behaviour

But have you ever wondered how it all began? Who made these rules??

Are they really that important???

EtiquetteEtiquette As the story goes, Louis XIV’s gardener at

Versailles was faced with a serious problem – he could not stop members of the nobility from trampling about it in delicate areas of the king’s garden. He finally attempted to dissuade their unwanted behaviour by posting signs called etiquets which warned them to “Keep off the grass”.

When this course of action failed, the king himself had to issue an official decree that no one could go beyond the bounds of the signs.

Later, the name “etiquette” evolved and the name was given to a ticket for court functions that included rules regarding where to stand and what to do.

So what does Etiquette So what does Etiquette involve?involve?

Knowing/ respecting people’s customs and traditions Observing certain behaviour and actions when in a

group of people Observing appropriate manners

Always Remember:Your behaviour and manners should consistently

correspondwith your well groomed image“You never get a second chance

to make a good first impression.”

No matter what lessons

are taught, it is the individual style that has to be cultivated by a lot of sacrifices and a burning desire to be groomed.

You should self-discipline yourself to ensure Good Grooming.

All the best

The Importance of Buffing up The Importance of Buffing up EtiquetteEtiquetteMakes a favorable impression and

portrays a positive image.Reveals social skills and demonstrates

respect to clients and superiors.Builds self confidence in personal and

professional interaction. Avoids embarrassing moments.Essential to professional success.

GOOD MANNERS & ETIQUETTEGOOD MANNERS & ETIQUETTETRAITSTRAITS• DISCIPLINED & DECENT

OUTLOOK• EXHIBITS HUMILITY• SHOWS CONCERN FOR OTHERS• HEALTHY STATE OF MIND &

BODY• GOOD GROOMING• PLEASANT PERSONALITY

DISCIPLINED OUTLOOKDISCIPLINED OUTLOOK• MINDING ONE’S OWN BUSINESS• NOT TO CAUSE HARDSHIP TO

OTHERS• MAINTAINING ORDER• SELF CONTROL• MAINTAINING GOOD RELATIONSHIPS

HUMILITYHUMILITY• ENHANCES

PERSONALITY• DISPLAY OF

RESPECT• BRINGS

GOODWILL

CONCERN FOR OTHERSCONCERN FOR OTHERS• RESPECT OTHERS• DON’T HURT THEIR

FEELINGS• BE GRATEFUL TO

PARENTS, TEACHERS, FRIENDS, WELL WISHERS & ELDERS

• SHOW KINDNESS

GREETING OTHERSGREETING OTHERSALWAYS GREET PEOPLE • FORMAL ( “Good Afternoon..”)• SEMI – FORMAL ( “HELLO” )• INFORMAL (“ HELLO” / “ Hi “)

HEALTHHEALTH• BODY – MIND – SPIRIT• PHYSICAL EXERCISES • YOGA• MEDITATION• PRAYER

PERSONALITYPERSONALITY• Dress & Make-up -- smart &

neat• Personal Hygiene & Grooming--

clean & pleasant• Behavior-- charming & caring• Friendship-- dependable & loyal• Conversation-- polite &

informative• Class Outlook-- attractive &

magnetic with excellent manners.

• SMILE

GROOMINGGROOMING

• LANGUAGE• DRESS• PERSONAL HYGIENE• FRIENDS• HONESTY• LEADERSHIP• COURAGE, HARD WORK,

PUNCTUALITY• SOCIAL OUTLOOK• PLEASANT PERSONALITY• SMILE

MANNERS in PUBLIC MANNERS in PUBLIC PLACESPLACES• In Public places – AVOID

spitting, littering, shouting; • Follow civic and traffic rules• In Work Places- Greet people,

follow good manners• While Dining- Close your mouth

while chewing, eat neatly; Follow table manners

BODY LANGUAGE• POSTURES

• STANDING- erect & attentive• WALKING- smart & careful• SITTING- polite & cheerful

• DINING- relax & enjoy

LEARN TO SAY LEARN TO SAY “THANK YOU”“THANK YOU”FOR ANY ASSISTANCE / HELP FOR ANY ASSISTANCE / HELP GIVEN TO YOUGIVEN TO YOU

WHEN SOMEBODY THANKS YOU, YOU SHOULD ALWAYS ACKNOWLEDGE WITH THE PHRASE

“ YOU ARE WELCOME ”

Saying…” Please….”Saying…” Please….”•Learn to say “please..” whenever you requestfor a favour, help or assistance.

•This one of the most pleasant words in the English language.

•People will readily oblige if the word “PLEASE” is used pleasantly.

These are some common slip-ups which we often make

Poor listening skills

Disregard of shared property and others’ space

Embarrassing others

Poor table manners

Inappropriate praise of others

And some more of And some more of them…them…

Inappropriate language

Disregard of others’ time

Inappropriate dress and grooming

Misuse of telephone

Failure to greet someone appropriately

OK, here are some tips to keep in OK, here are some tips to keep in mind when dining outmind when dining out

Sit straight with both feet on the floor, legs together

Elbows never on the table

Speak softly to those nearest to you

Thank the waiter only once or twice

Tip well

Enquire from the host/ hostess about dress code for the function invited

Abide by local customs/ religious practices of host/ hostess

Men should assist ladies to be seated by pulling out the chair

You should You should avoidavoid this while this while diningdining

Placing your handbag/ purse on the table

Gesturing with your knife or spoon

Putting food into your mouth with a knife

Chomping your food

Talking with your mouth full

Wiping your mouth with your hand when holding a knife/ fork

Reaching across people to get a dish. Instead ask for it to be passed to you

Playing with the cutlery around you

Wiping your face with the napkin

Applying lipstick at the table

These are some of the basic rules: 1.Wash your hands before and after meal;2.Close your mouth and eat. Eat Noiselessly.3.Don’t talk with food in your mouth;4.Preferably eat with your right hand.5.Wait until everyone else is seated before

starting to eat;6.Don’t spill or waste food.7.Don’t read or talk on your cell phone during

the meal.8.If you must get up in-between, excuse

yourself.

NetiquetteNetiquette1. Your image on e-mail is as important as your image on

the phone or in person.2. Employers can and do monitor e-mail & internet

activity.3. Respond within 48 hours.4. If it is important, leave a phone message as well.5. Always proofread and spell check.6. Watch your tone, as many things can be

misunderstood.7. Include a subject, salutation and closing.8. Do not use web jargon.

L cal u n u’l rmv ua cel 2 c hu hs cld n I cn recgns

Telephone Etiquette1. Do not chew gum, eat, drink, read, type or hold side

conversations.2. Always ask before putting someone on hold.3. When leaving your phone number, it should take you as

long to say it as it would someone to write it down.4. Ask before using speaker phone.5. Return calls by the end of the day, or within 24 hours.6. When leaving a message, always include your phone

No. 7. Identify yourself when making a call8. Address the caller by his name in a courteous manner9. Keep conversation brief10.Never be curt11.Listen carefully

Cell phone etiquetteCell phone etiquetteTurn cell phone off when at a public

performanceDon’t dial while drivingDon’t speak loud while in publicDon’t have an annoying ringtoneNever take personal calls during business

meetingStay at least 10 feet away from people

while talkingYou should not get attached to your phone

Never talk in elevators, libraries, museums, restaurants, cemeteries, theaters, dentist, waiting rooms, places of worship, auditoriums, emergency rooms, and buses

Never multi-task by using cell phone while shopping, and banking

Use an earpiece in high-traffic or noisy locations

Do not have more then one wireless device on your belt

Should not wear an earpiece while your not on the phone

Do not try to impress with your phone

CORRECT BODY POSTURECORRECT BODY POSTURE

Body Language• Can reveal feelings • Posture important• Hands / Legs - avoid fidgeting• Face – window to the soul• Eye contact• Smile

Powerful Body LanguagePowerful Body LanguageOpenness: Open hands, unbuttoned coat. Confidence: Steepled hands, hands

behind back, back stiffened, hands in coat pockets with thumb out, fingers forming pyramid.

Cooperation: Upper body in sprinter's position, open hands, sitting on edge of chair, hand to face gestures, unbuttoning coat.

Weak Body LanguageWeak Body LanguageNervousness: Pinching flesh, fidgeting,

covering mouth, jiggling money or keys, tugging ears, wringing hands.

Frustration: Tightly clenched hands, wringing hands, fist-like gestures, pointing index finger, rubbing hand through hair, rubbing back of neck.

Defensiveness: Arms crossed, sideways glance, touching-rubbing nose, rubbing eyes, buttoned coat, drawing away.

Insecurity: Pinching flesh, chewing pen, thumb over thumb, biting fingernail.

VoiceVoice

• The moment a person speaks he / she can be judged

• Must sound sincere and confident• Pronunciation is important• Tone of voice• Loudness• Avoid using slang

Executive Like QualitiesExecutive Like QualitiesKnocking the door of the cabin of the person you

are visiting and taking permission to enter before entering the cabin.

- Always checking up with the executives of the company or their secretaries for an appointment for better time management and as manners.

- Pick up the phone before two to three rings.- On phone, being polite.- On phone, answer by giving your company's

name, your name and department's name.- Whenever you receive a phone for some one

else, take down the name of the caller, his organization name, telephone number and pass them on to the person who was called.

- Never put a caller on the hold for more than a few seconds. In case you wish to do it, request for the caller's permission to do so.

- Always be 100% punctual in meetings. - Always go fully prepared for meetings, keep all the

relevant data/information with you. - Say "good morning”, "good evening" etc as

appropriate with a warm, firm and brief hand shake. Never keep holding the hand of the person with whom you are shaking hands.

- Do not shake hands with particularly Indian ladies on your own (unless she takes initiative). Say "namaste" politely with folded hands. Do study the cultural aspects of such greetings and salutations for other cultures too.

- In a situation where it is OK to shake hand with a lady, squeeze the hand no harder than she squeezes yours.

- Never say "good night" when you are meeting another person in the evening/night. The correct salutation is "good evening". When you part company in the night then only say "good night".

Try to remember the correct names of the persons with whom you are dealing and address them by their correct names. Never call other person by yelling a "hello" or "Sh sh sh" etc. They are bad manners.

- Never keep your mouth open while taking a yawn. Close it by keeping a palm over the mouth. In the first place do not yawn in front of others, control it.

- While sitting do not keep shaking your legs. - Keep your mouth clean of bad breath. Do not eat

garlic or onions etc during the day time if possible. - Keep your body clean of bad odors. Keep yourself

clean and use perfume/deodorant.

- Do not talk/gossip with a fellow colleague sitting next to you during the conduct of meetings.

- In case you have to go out of a running meeting under some compulsion, do so without disturbing others.

- Always offer chair to others for sitting. - Do not shout while talking. Always keep your cool. - You must dress properly, well fitting, clean and well

pressed clothes. - Do not wear the same socks every day. Wash them. - Polish your shoes regularly. - Shave daily without any exception (for men). - Never spit. - Cut your nails regularly. - Comb your hair properly. - Do not keep scratching your body in public.

- Rehearse your sentences in mind before you speak out.

- Be friends with your subordinates but never become familiar because familiarity breeds contempt.

- Keep diary and make sure that whatever tasks you undertake should be completed in time.

- You should not be seen whiling away your time or gossiping.

- Do not have favorites. Treat every one professionally.

- Never leak out company secrets, policies and confidential information.

- If you do not drink, say a polite "no, thanks" for drinks. If you do drink, keep it in limits in parties.

Note:-Using proper manners is not difficult and requires only a little practice and proper training.

I hope I have been able to answer most of your queries and clarify

your doubts. If you have any further

questions on this topic…

…..you can address them to rfernz@yahoo.com

Thank you! Bye !