Subgenius Pamphlet

8/13/2019 Subgenius Pamphlet

1/14

The World Ends Tomorrow andYOU

Well, no, probably not...but whatever you do, just keep reading!

ARE WE CONROE" #$ SECRETFORCES?

ARE A%EN &'ACE (ON&ER&

#R%N)%N) A STARTLING NEWWORLD?

"O 'EO'E *%N+ $O-RE

STRANGE?DO YOU??

...THEN YOU AY !E ON THE RIGHT TRAC"#

"Unpredictables" are not alone and possess amazing hidden powers of their own!

Are Yo$A%normal?

YES# YOUR "IND SHALL TRIU&H#


2/14

I'you are what they all /di00erent/ 11I'you think we-re entering a new "ark Ages 11

I'you see the universe as one vast 2orbid sense o0 hu2or 11I'you are looking 0or an inherently bogus religion that will ondone superior

degeneray and tell you that you are /above/ everyone else 11I'you an help us with a donation 11

ouldsave your sanity!

"You'd PAY to know what you AY think#"11"obbs 3453FEELING LI"E THERE(S )UST NO SLAC"?$ou 2ay have -&napped- already 0ro2 the in0or2ation disease! $"%he sleep of reason begetsmonsters#"&he Churh o0 the &ub)enius reogni6es the progra22ing!

Loo* +o +he H,-h Unred,/+a%les o' +he Ch$r/h o' +he S$%Gen,$s 'or an/$l+$ral

dero-ramm,n- and res0n/hron,1a+,on#

'er0et your subli2inal vision 11 edit your 2e2ory 11 relive your reinarnality! SYNC U

Th,s ,s +he or,-,nal T,me Con+rol ro-ram +ha+ has heled +ho$sands +o 'ear no

lon-er +he STAR" FIST o' REO2AL.

!e/ome &HYSICALLY ATTRACTI2E 33 o4ern,-h+#

Now you, too, an speak to benevolent aliens at the Al+er o' 53,s+ Con+a/+. earnrame(traightening) *ody epair) +ripe laboration) un,-u) renzy %echni.ues)

/cremeditation) the ssentials of (urvivaland TIE CONTROL. Attettdnd 0' %he1orld 2rillsand 3hance abs. earn to '%enlike. Evaluate the so1alled /aidents/ and/oinidenes/ in your ti2estrea2. 'er0or2 long, o2pliated rites o0 initiation and ritualso0 3ommunionication.Accullateyoursel0 to the Churh, where you will be isolated, givena new diet, a new set o0 habits, and an altered label and appearane. he new void in yourbran1pan will be re0illed with orreted in0o and subonsiously i2planted rituale7perienes. 8ollow your 8O%E& and CO('&%ON& and beo2e rih like us.E7plore the /9en/ o0 stupidity! Channel hroni prorastination into li0e1saving paranoia

and preise anatityl4A, 1A(%!!8ind out who your 'ersonal &aviors 2ay be and who are the 8alse 'rophets in your life!

YES6 YOU AY !E THE SU!GENIUS6 ASTER OF THE STOOGLEY ARTS#

&er'orm +he Sal$+e#

The mos+ (NO WAY( new wa-e rel,-,on o' +hem all##

!ra,n3+r$s+ o' o$r se/,es##


3/14

leg: la hora del 0in

sing &ub)enius serets o0 #"A"A and (OREA%&( you annow (%RACO&$ E%(%NAE CO('&%;E R)E& suh ass2oking, lethargi6ing, overeating, inso2nia, the inability to take drugs,onstipation, old age, se7 and 2oney proble2s, baldness, illness, the

Work %nstint, assouliness, and pain0ul shortage o0 &AC+!

his is a /er+,',ed rel,-,ono0 sorn and vengeane direted at all o0 *E(, the ene2ies o0 us Outsiders. %t is/sel01help/ thorugh so00ing and blasphe2ing, 0ren6ied 0orniation and the u2ping o0 )raven %2ages. heChurh provides answersand m,ra/lesin the servie o0 &REA;O%ON./%gnore the 2an behind the urtain/ 11 O6

The Ch$r/h o' +he S$%Gen,$s ,s +he $l+,ma+e se/re+ order6 +he s$er,or %ra,n /$l+ 'or +hose who 7*now

%e++er7 %$+ who demand ,n +he LUST 'or GRINS a se/+a/$lar6 se/,al3e''e/+s3laden %el,e' s0s+em 33 a

(s+$ors+,+,on.(

his religion, devised by preise 2athe2atial 0or2ulae, weirder than the 2ost obsure 8OCO(%N) ARAC%ON&


4/14

=ehovah 311 spae god

he Churh o0 the &ub)enius is the 'AN1RE%)%ON o0the 8RE, and RE#E& against the na2by1pa2by,

goody two1shoes /NEW A)E/ and /A?AR%AN/ idealso0 2ost oult weirdos. &uh people are 0ools, they do noturse, they have no understanding o0 the need 0or spiritualviolene in this 2odern spae1age a1go1go soiety.he &ub)enius wants no part o0 the /New Age,/ it isalready here and it obviously suks. he &ub)enius wouldrather RER%E;E the 2anly 'ast, be0ore 34>3 or even34IF, or else dwell in the naughty, 0un1loving RE(OE8RE, a strange ti2e when anything 2ade o0 plasti isa valuable antiBue that olletors will +% 0or, when&E*R will be reogni6ed and indulged in as sane

hu2an nature no matterwhether any -hurh- or -govern2ent- allowsit. #ut suh things are R%8E&! he&ub)enius knowsthat =E*O;A* 3 is a ;EN)E8 )O" O8 WRA*! =E*O;A* 3 1 a.k.a. $A*WE* 1is a 2ad alien, 0ull o0 eyes round about, *e o2eth with the louds, radioative, all1pervading, *e has 0orged*is ovenant with the &ub)enius in C*A%N& o0 )ENE%C 'RO)RA((%N) and "E(AN"&O#E%&ANCE to *is ave2an sense o0 hu2or. *e has been denying us &AC+ and what *e is 2aking us dodates bak to *o2o Connetus, 8irst Whole (anK only by letting our bodies obey the Code o0 0inanial lustsurvival that is built into the2 an our brains be 0reed 0ro2 his %NE;%A#E 8%&.

Everything we do, have done, or will ever do, nor2ally on1the1job but also and espeially onthe ausationallevel o0 2iro1ato2i ourenes and billionth1o01a1nanoseond eletron ollisions, is ditated by theper2utations o0 the great &+ORE, the os2i worknet o0 ause1and1e00et, the 2uta2orphi ARC*%;E o0

the shapes and 2ove2ents o0 every blood tik, sper2 whale, va2pire gnat, 2ovie star and gorgosaurus, /allthe 2oleules o0 oil on all the grains o0 sand o0 every 2oonlit beah o0 the world. / No, "Y0U 3A5'%36A5+ %6 (,0#"#ut =E*O;A* 3 an...and like an a7 this OA 8AE 'RO)RA( on0rontsour si2ilarly1enoded &EN&E O8 &AC+ and leaves our heads straight down the 2iddle intoshi6oephali right and le0t sides whose sub1id battleground is responsible 0or our preariously balanedNENA %;E& lones o0 us in the spirit world whose dupliate lusts in0luene ourbehavioron this 2aterialplane. $es 1 =E*O;A* 3 s2ote us in pri2eval days with #A" #RA+E& by whih we annot stop our deviltwin 0ro2 overo2ing our -better nature- and by whih, 0urther2ore, we annot even begin to tell thedi00erene between the two!*rakeskeep us 0ro2 o22itting AN$*%N) WE (%)* %(A)%NE %N OR(O& "AN)ERO& 8EE%N) 8ANA&%E&, suh as hopping o00 noisy hildren-s heads and giving...well, all o0 us, even non1&ub)eniuslike whi2ps o0 the seond and third waters, are =ekyll


5/14

he &ub)enius releases this pent1up nenergy in throes o0 =E*O;A*1&'AWNE" (ORA "E)ENERAC$and R%E& O8 *%AR%A%ON @/Within reason,/ autions the e0t #rain, just as his dog2a, laws and tenetsondone. We RE#E against the alien =E*O;A* 3 and yet 'ACAE *i2 at the sa2e ti2e that *e 2ightnot s2ite us with nulear war, a worldwide eono2i disaster or hostile 8O&.%0 we pay attention to the675%(andA36%YP(he dangles like answerable 2ysteries be0ore our eyes we2ay yet 0ind a path o0 %74 305%0to the*07, where we a2e 0ro2 and go a0ter we die, andhene to &AC+ in our li0eti2es. "on-t get *eaven and *ell all 2i7ed up like 2ost people do. &erve

=ehovah 3 as *e 2eant 0or you to, go 0orth on CA'ER& and &CA(& and 8ORN%CA%ON&K your onsieneis an illusion, there is 2erely an %N&%NC%;E #E*A;%OR CO"E, to repress it is to su00oate, but never0orget 0or a seond that it is the 2onster god who allows this, who de2ands it, 0or /&C%ENCE "OE& NORE(O;E *E ERROR O8 *E )O"&!/ 8EAR *%( but 0ollow the hints o0 the aidents in your li0e,0ollow thePA%6 0 A(% (7(%A53and you will gob out 0ro2 under the sari0ies *e de2ands o0 allthe '%N+ #O$& around you, your 8O%E& and 8O%#E& will show you where &lak lies and you will beable to rela7 and not get a heart attak.8609A6 ,7(those who drudge their lives away without knowingwho *e is, but he1A2(the ones who reogni6e *is (%A, 7(%and arry out *is &EE(%N)$%((ORA 'AN& while (A3,75+ 0 9Y 36A53 %6Y +%#=E*O;A*-& &'EC%A (E&&A)E 0or the &ub)enius is that %67( +0(( P6Y(73A PA5 20( 50%:7(%and that the o2pulsion 0or suess in the eyes o0 others is 2ankind-s most 0U invention#%6 (U*+57U( 7( 8609A6'( P74 %00, he has a ovenant with this deitoid Who is well pleasedwhen *is subjets have the wisdo2 to obey *i2. %t is the &ared Chore o0 the &ub)enius to &(%E andE%(%NAE the unwitting, slavish non1partners o0 =ehovah 3 the )reat nwashed, the *oi 'olloi, %hem,the Conspiray, the (edioretins, the strange nor2al ones, the &o2na2bulas, Assouls, Cage (en, 'ink#oys, #ootlips, 'O-#ukers, #ear1#aiters, E2p oyees, #o7 "wellers, &arnes, Anthropophobias, %n0idels,Con0or2ers, i2eservers, (ole 'eople, Co2(en, 'roleterritorials, Auto2ates, 'hilistines, 'harisees,&agisees, Withburners, &kurnbo6i, hankers, Wankers and #lankers, *eilers and &2ilers, %di1Atts, Credit*eads, &loths and (oths, Cons and =ohns, #arbies and +ens, Cliants, osers, Weepers and &leepers, "irty%nvariables, he &lakless Ones, "ibbies, Corpulators, &igni0ying (onkeys, nderalls...in short, theRe2nants o0 (an the Witless 'rinipals who aretheA( P0P6%(, who have been holding us bakand 0oring i2e Addition on the2selves...and...others.No 2atter their %.?.s they are all about a brik shy o0 a 0ull loadK they think they are high1te2perature sinus

e00luvia on a silver platter but they are in atuality sub16ero 2uus enrustation on a paper plate.=E&& said, /#eware o0 0alse prophets, whih o2e to you in sheep-s lothing, but inwardly they areravening wolves./ @(att. >3I/ake heed lestany 2an deieve you 0or 2any shall o2e in (y na2e, saying, % a2 Christ, andshalldeieve 2any. . . 0or 0alse Christs and 0alse prophets shall rise, and shallshowsigns and wonders, to sedue,i0 it were possible, the very elect#/ @(ark LI, HH


6/14

THE CONS&IRACY#

he idea that A2eria @or any ountry values individuality as the highest idealis a 2yth. 'erhaps in si2pler ti2es it was true, but no modernindustrial

soiety an really a00ord a population o0 unpreditables. his is not surprising 1 the longhistory o0 our ult-s perseution by the Conspiray goes bak 0or generations untold, andindeed there are signs o0 their hoary repression o0 prehu2an &ub)enii dating 0ro2 before/2an-s/ appearane on Earth. All o0 ivili6ation-s pain0ul and 2isguided li2b up 0ro2 thepri2eval sli2e, and its subseBuent loss o0 &lak and of any class at all, has been indelibly2arked, nay, entirely motivated, by the aeons1bridging on0lit between the Conspiray-s2indlessly hikenshit Witless 'rinipals and the =ehovah1spawned, grandiose depravity

o0 the superior yet ethnially all1eno2passing rae o0 latent &ub)eniuses. @$ou shouldknow this 1you were;will be there in the *eforelife! he 0at that only in reent years has/our kind/ begun to reogni6e our own sovereignty de2onstrates both how viious havebeen heir e00orts at 0urther denying us &lak and yet how near is our rae to R%('*.All this is %(AE 'ROO8 that =ehovah 3 has not only pro2oted the &ub)enius as*is &peial ool, but hassimultaneouslypulled the strings whih 2ake %hemendarkenhe2selves with their hereditary ignorany and us with their ubisti with1huntsuperstitions. *is /reason/ 0or this two10aed obediene1shool progra22ing, this0issioning o0 history into binary /war eBuations,/ un0ortunately, or, perhaps, thank0ully,re2ains a total 2ystery.no slopeheads alone ould build, the 2irales o0 the Old

esta2ent, all these and 2ore are events so ine7triably interwoven with the invisible bakground war

between =ehovah and the ists that all the /Anient Astronaut/ 0ossils in the world 0urnish only the barest o0lues. @he 2ovie rights AONE to these gut1splitting tales o0 reinarnanient history are worth millions!$ea, it has even been suggested that the Carpenter o0 Na6areth hi2sel0, )od =r., =esus -What, (e WorryJ-Christ, was in atuality a -spae detetive- o0 the ists, walking the Earth in hu2an 0or2 with the 2ission o0e7triating us 0ro2 the (onster )od-s grip.

he blak shadow o0 the Conspiray, un0ortunately, has seen to it thateven *is teahings were diluted and distorted until hu2an atte2pts to0ollow the2 were 0ully as 2isguided as the arving o0 the heads o0Easter %sland or the -runways- o0 Na6a.And so the true destiny o0 the &ub)enius has been kept seret 0ro2(an. 8or =ehovah 3 is to the ists and s what a hungry 0isher2an is toa pri6e 0ish and his 0avorite pet wor2 1 the last in the an. *ow 2any2illion other raes were used be0ore us in these ghastly galati water1sportsJ

)EHO2AH 8 ANI&ULATES US FOR HIS OWN SINISTER

ENDS.


7/14

Y0U U%U 6A( *5 A 304P% 4Y(%Y###

8or Y0Uare luky enough to /live/ in the End i2es when the Word o0 =ehovah-s 'ri2eOrdinane has been 2ade known to /(an/kind by the 'ri2ani2al &ub)enius, the *igh Epopt o0

the Churh!%n the early 8i0ties an industrious young A2erian drilling eBuip2ent sales2an, while wathinglate1night ;, was abruptlyemovedand transported astrally to the -%")E- o0 =E*O;A* 3*%(&E8! %n this sei6ure1like trane he took the brunt o0 the 0irst brain1bu00etingo22unioniations o0 ountless to o2e 0ro2 the alien =ehovah aweso2e pronoune2ents whih 0or2 thesaredP(37P%U(o0 the &ub)enius @available 0or &34.4L at 2ost bookstores!

his 2ilestone in (an-s 2ined path to &lak was

THE DI2INE EACULATION OF ).R. 7!O!7 DO!!S##

Who IS 7!o%7?

While yet the least approahable or srutable o0 the vast &ub)enius 2e2bership, he is the pree2inent and2ost 0reBuently invoked o0 the god16illionPersonal (aviorso0 the &ub)enius. While he re2ains ananony2ous e7eutive shunning publiity or reognition at a 0aeless 2ultinational orporation, he isnevertheless he (ost Asended (aster, the original Retriever o0 =ehovah-s (essage on Earth and basi2odel o0 the Arhetype &ub)enius. *e set the /anti1pattern/ o0 rando2 ondut a2ong all those who arenow pratiing &ub)eniuses. *is are the de0ets and peadillos that we -anali6e,- his the (longs and 8estswhih we devotedly twist and distort 0or 0uture generations aording to our une7plored whi2s. 1And yettheonly photos o0 hi2 that e7ist are grainy 0ra2e blow1ups 0ro2 )rade 9 2ovie thrillers in whih he played bitparts!

"obbs is, o0 ourse, the ulti2ate sy2bol o0 &ub)eniusness, but despite


8/14

8ro2 "obbs a2e the propheti utteranes whih are now severe and o2pulsory enets o0 the Churh. *epopulari6ed the onept o0 Critial1'aranoia 8ollies Evaluation by whih we know that /...any inanityspoutedby a &ub)enius at any given ti2e auto2atially beo2es part o0 orthodo7 &ub)enius iturgy./ %t isone o0 the single greatest enets, 0or by its own very tokenone an also deny it later. %t is erasable. 8orinstane, a guilty &ub)enius speaks an %nanity whih later proves anti1nonpro0it. *e an then insist, /No,7didn't say that. %t was 2erely 2y -i2age-...2y -id- took over te2porarily./ ogially, then, nothing that a&ub)enius says is any 2ore or less true and onserable than any other thing he just happens to utter 1 even@and especially i0 they are ontraditory. he &ub)enius isan hebephrenia O7y2oron who speaks in &langsand o7y2ora. (o it doesn't matter what you say or who hears you say it. &eeJ "obbs denies vehe2ently thatthings should ever happen aording to preset -plans,- telling us to look instead to the blunders and 0lukes o0our lives 0or inspiration 1 0or will not =ehovah deter2ine our 0ates at every twist and turn anyway


9/14

$es! A senti2ental 0ool who never grew up and who ries over lost ideals, a sinner and a goo01o00, the&ub)enius is 0ully apable o0 reieving authenti god1onsiousness 0ro2 soap operas and 2onster 2ovies,junkyards and /dives,/ 0reakshows and bak alleys whih 2ost nor2als have been progra22ed to onsider

-du2b.- What %heyannot know is that -du2bness- 1 Cheepnis 1 vital and sinere ignorane 1 reveals 0ar 2oreabout the %nterestingly ;iolent and aboo World Around s than any overpried geegaw that ritis and 'ink#oys have told us is /art/ or /siene./ *E )EN%& 8AR& A *O&E W*O WO" E *%(W*A *E &*O" &'EN" (ONE$ ON. A wino 2u2bling in his own vo2itus is dribbling parables o0as soaring a height o0 bulldada as the rih, rea2y superstitions o0 a thousand popes and with dotors.#ulldada is aidental greatness, inadvertent *ilariation, but40A7(4is the deliberate invoation o0bulldada and is now heralded by the Churh o0 the &ub)enius. %n his works o0 2orealis2 the &ub)eniusstrives 0or ski21proo0shock value) overembellishment) bludgeon humor and morbid yuks. hus, like his2entor /#ob,/ he is a great Wiseare, an orthodo7 0undada2entalist and a &at2an. 7FUC" THE IFTHEY CAN(T TA"E A )O"E.7

COUNTLESS &ERSONAL SA2IORS##

he &ub)enius knows, bulldadaistially, that eah hu2an should do =ehovah-s work e7atly as *e reveals itto the2, and that *e has wildly varying 2essages 0or di00erent people in di00erent situations. #y the sa2etoken, it is 2adness to aept any one -personal savior- 1 even 2obbs1 as a per2anent guide. he greatest o0the inventions o0 the &ub)enius is the &*OR "RA%ON 'ER&ONA &A;%OR, or /(hordurpersav./he rue &ub)enius aepts into his heart, as his own personal savior, anyone or anything with whih hehappens to be i2pressed at the moment. &hordurpersavs hange 0ro2 hour to hour, whi2 to whi2. %t ouldbe the hero o0 a show you just saw, the author o0 a 0ilthy book, a bottle o0 hunderbird, a good pal, a ar, adog, a se7 objet, a 0riendly roaker who sripts 0or you. Not pro0essional gurus you are loked intobelieving, but te2porary ones aording to the need o0 the /Now. / hey hange so 0ast that it never gets

e2barrassing, you aren-t inlined to -proselyti6e- the2 o00 on disinterested others who will later laugh at youKyou know their e00ets will wear o00 in 2inutes @even though the very idea is unthinkable while under the%n0luene. One needs not 2ention the2 at all 1 a superb enet, sine one is so2eti2es deeply ashamedo0onesel0 0or having a partiularly unsavory &hordurpersav so2e 0ew an be 'ersonal &aviors and 8alse'rophets at the same time.

With this plethora o0 reo2binant philosophies and 'ersonal &aviors, the &ub)enius is well10ueled, stoked tothe 0usion1point with spiritual 0odder. One he has /deided/ whether to attak li0e through the REWAR"&$&E( @/Oh, Well-- or the4+53Y (Y(%4@/0h (hit!/, he is pri2ed up and ready to plunge,with or without the onsent o0 "obbs @who he will probably never 2eet into the &lak1&earh through the

(hort 1ave Activitiesor4inor luctuations of the (toogely Artswhih 2ake up the daily li0e o0 the'ratiing @as opposed to atent, Rogue, or Renegade &ub)enius.


10/14

he 2ost 0reBuently indulged o0 these Ativities is /+0**75+ 05 7, /opposite 0ro2 yet si2ilar to theritual /(assing Around/ o0 he2. ike the anient alhe2ists in searh o0 their alleged 'hilosopher-s &tone,he is 2erelygobbing, trying to -get by- with as little e00ort and as well1greased 2istakes as possible on the'ath o0 east Resistane. O0ten 2isonstrued as a totally unonstrutive, sloth0ul li0estyle, it is atually a*oly )railoid -%on ?uest- 0or the sared priniple o0 (omething for 5othing1 he is, in e00et, trying to beo2ea perpetual 2otion 2ahine, 0ueled only by the wel0are o0 the &tate whih heonsiders 2erely a phantas2,another illusion in this vale o0 none7istent 2aterial things. %0 nothing else, he at least beo2es an e7pert8loorsleeper and ube2aster. A rih or else industrious spouse is a welo2e partner on this sared road, a0avorite o0ewardianswho seek ti2elessly to reward the2selves 0or things they are /about to do./

mergentiles, on the other hand @the e0t, sy2bollially, 0ollow loser the splayyed0ootsteps o0 /#ob/ by striving 0or a pure state o0 Anarho1(aterialis2 in their lives."E;Otional Coveting is the -yoga- o0 the Anarapitalist. &wi22ing upstrea2. "At alltimes there is an emergency to be dealt with#"Always punishing the2selves 0or ats they-llo22it later, it is like wading uphill through 2ud, desperately haking out with a broken2ahete little short1lived learings o0 &lak in the ever1regenerating soial swa2p.

Working, in e00et, until it-s too late tostopworking. Adopting so2e &.C.A.(.@&ub)enius Con0idene Anarho2ateriali6ation or Caper, he sets out to ollet, 0or theChurh o0 his ownheart, "ues, ithes and %ndulgenes. What -business- or -2aneuver- heloaks this ativity in has no i2portane to =ehovahK *e is an eono2i god, and de2andsReturns. 8or *is prophits, *e grants ;est2ents and Wages o0 &inK and, while *is servantsare indentured, they reap what they sow an thousand0old. "7t is as easy for a rich man toenter the ,ingdom of 6eaven as for a needle to pass through the 3amera's ye# 1hocares< verybody's trying to buy property in 6ell#"1 "obbs, 3453 @*oward *ughes, nowa la2a in ibet, was an E2ergentile &ub)enius be0ore going Rogue Rewardian. /+eepyour ads up./

Other &ub)eniuses 2ay de2and an erotially sinspiring slap in the 0aith and hoose to 0urther *ilariatethe2selves by turning inwards, retrieving sweaty reinarnality 0ro2 the Arhives and erasing their 8untion1&he2es. ;arious 2ethods o0 deprogra22ing the ldge are available, 2any o0 the2 also o2pulsory, and bye7ploring undisovered 2oods, probing pet phobias, editing the 2e2ory through Negative Cutting, &ynapseCon0or2ing, #rainwathing and &ara2entality through chemistry, the eager &ub)enius e7plodes 0orth intoa virtual *iroshi2a o0 visions, propheies, &ei6ures, E2aulations, speaking in &langs, blanking o00, slinging&longs and traning out.


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8or beginners, teens and the "obbs $outh, who o0ten lak the patiene, parental approvalor 0inanial resoures 0or suh e7oti treat2ents at the ab, instant nervanal psuedoslak@0alse highs every bit as 0ul0illing as the so1alled /real/ thing are Buikly reahed throughrepetitive, 2onotonousAmphetaminoid Pundingis. %n0inite variations o0 the basi 8ren6yehniBues are possible, but 0astest results o2e 0ront painstakingly e7euted Reels,Chants, *y2ns, E7oris2s, 'rayvings, 'rorastinational O001'uttings, (iselogeni6ings,and Eteterapings. &o2e elet to alter their onsienelessnesses by 0asting and speedingon the &ub)enius %ndustrial "iet @with lose atte2ption to (ove2ents, or throughdangerous and 0oolhardy estes o0 8aith. Other lients beo2e 8un+ou (asters o0 the(artian Arts o0 )rutledge, a 2anly i0 rando2 shool o0 physial har2.*ighly analiti6ed, strungtaut Co2pulsub)eniuses are ontent only when they are, A A%(E&, 0ollowing the uni2aginably stern aws and "itates o0 the horrorbible !oo* o'

+he S$%Gen,$s, adjusting their lives no matter the costto the hree ists o0 Approved,#anned, and Co2pulsory %hings to (ee) (ay) 2o) %hink) ,now) and *uy. 8inally, the 2ostsub o0 the &ub)enii just sit and bliss all over the2selves through theesser 4editations'yro0latulation, Crepignition, oogial 'artile Retrieval, the ga2e o0 %hey Always nd Up0n %heir 6eads, (editation o0 the Avenging Cylops, &even1#laded Wind1breaker,(oroni*luh>Yahip 8lappage, E7ruiating =oint 'opping, 8libak, the &ilent Nostril(ining, and, o0 ourse, ubing.

Co22on to the whorship o0 all &ub)enia, however, are the wonders o00573A%7057(4, about whih the Churh-s eternal prudene allows nothing to be saidin print, and...E5CREEDITATION#Every 0ew hours, the &ub)enius e7perienes the2ost onrete reality o0 all, the i2pervious realness o0 staring at the wall while voiding.his o0 all the (editations is the 2ost 2agikal, 0or is it not also the least evitableJ Eventhe 8alse 'rophets are 0ored to do it. %t is the daily 2o2ent when eah hu2an is 0aedwith pro0ound onte2plation o0 hi2sel0, and even i0 he 0eels it to be an unlean at, it onlyinstills the bland virtue o0 hu2ility.#ut i0 he /attends/ this neessary period o0 subgenitalai gut blowout and bladder de0lationas a prodigious gi0t 0ro2 )od, and truly mountsthat espeial *ead, he reieves a blissal2ost blinding in its intensity and with it an instintual o2prehension o0 the vast,

2eaning0ully pregnant Coarse o0 things and it is always healthy to 2o2entarilyaknowledge and acceptsuh a rando2 2a6e o0 deadloked physial laws as ourniverse, whih 0or the &ub)enius an hange its basi struture in the twinkling o0 aneyeK in these blisteringly transendent 2o2ents he o0ten reieves sinister inspiratorial2essages 0ro2 a whispering =ehovah 3 whih invariably provide direct answerstowardswhih the &ub)enius has been unonsiously struggling all day, W*A %& *E AWJNO O WA+ ON A 8OR&, *A %& *E AW. ARE WE NO (ENJ7% 7( A9A4P7


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brought this #uk Rogers 2onstrosity o0 2irohips and in0lation, nothing 2akes senseany2ore and everything osts too 2uh, the weather is weird, W*$ "%" *E$ "O %J2on't they know they're begging for the flaming sword of etribution


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purhasing anything dangled in 0ront o0 the2 by a superior intelligene whether thedangler is hu2an or not and whether what is dangled is hu2ane or not. $es the s2ilingFalse &rohe+sof every race will sell youhot lead, old steel, and a one1way tiket to *ellwithout it ever rossing their 2inds that the buttons were pushed by theirsBueaky1leanlittle pink 0ingers.And so A%EEE the gore1drenhed night1spawned +oal, the be1all and end1all o0 the 0ulldevastating evilangelis2 o0 the &ub)enius, is the Cas+,n- O$+ o' +he False &rohe+s. %t isthe voieless )round 9ero o0 the hree Anti1Nonviolent Ation 'rotogra2s409A)7475A%705, and the (30U75+o0 this age EarthK it is the &ared ;inditive)rudge1Chore o0 ;engeane at whih the groping alien 2onster god prods us.7nwhichever way 8ehovah ? instructs him, the &ub)enius Unmasksthose 8alse 'rophets ashe is wont to Re2ove @to asertain that a &ub)enius is not hiding beneathlK he4akes1itnessagainst the2, and in so doing unleashes the 0ull 0ore o0 the (okery &ienes(oking and Reviling, &o00ing and #lasphe2ing, (aking &port, aboo &hattering,Na2is2ati 8laudulation o0 the English anguage, the u2ping o0 )raven %2agesK inshort, 1aging the 1orand (miting the 7nfidels and yet he does this in common everydayconversationi0 he so hoosesK his 0oe never noties the subli2inal o22ands in the&ub)enius =ests. Eventually he esalates to &*OC+ ;AE he goes a2ong the ene2yRelabeling, 'ro1 phesying and "ieseting> 1ielding the aygun inger of Unrelenting 6umiliation in a zeal>fevered studlust ofterritorial se/hurt domination!! >#ut it is not enough 0or these 0at so0t devilsl "%oo much is always better than not enough#"1 "obbs, E.3HF. o slake his ever12ounting thirst 0or revenge he 0inds he 2ost gobeyond the -0or2al- ditates o0 the ChurhK his personal violene, in whatever 0or2, hase7eeded even those unholy shrieking li2itsK the trans0igured5+A2 (U*+57U(shi62s 0ro2 his odge, he joins an anti1&ub) operation suh as the 'ink #oys @in theproess disavowing any knowledge in general, he then shuks all se2blane o0 hu2anaeptability, goes 0ull1tilt (andrill and 0inally beo2es the 0eared0+U (U*+57U(,apable o0 anyun2entionable at and owing allegiane to nothing. he gun barrel bu2psone against the viti2-s 0orehead, he hears the lik only, not the !ANG, and he leaves

his arith2eti running down the wall behind hi2. 7F$/* Them I' The0 Can(+ Ta*e A)o*e.7*a! 1 but this has all been a sha2. o keep bla2e 0ro2 the Churh, the-Rogue- has been 2ain1 taining a 0alse 0ront o0 2adness while atuallyserv1 ing as a alulating Now1Or1ater5ihilatoro0 the )oon &Buad o0the &ub)enius! @Countless villains o0 history and siene were -Rogue&ub)eniuses- working =ehovah-s indeipherable plans. We ad2it all thisto insure disbelie0. %his is an action church!=ihad! *oly War!Religion is not so2e panty1waist 0or2ula to sit upon 0atly o2plaent!%t is lean1shaven WAR! "%he +ig is up#"We are all eBual in )od-seyes i0 not =ehovah-s and this gives us eah a divine liense to (47%!

=ehovah-s Winepress spilleth over with the blood o0 the innoent andthere 2ust be =&%CE! AA%%%EEEE! +ali $uga! he buttholes 2ustbe unti2ely Clipp-d! (ee then the (ub+enius and know that his awschange with the wind in his 3ontra 2iction!###his 3hurch thus reflects

life in all its sasmod,/ -lor0##


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he &ub)enius knows that a godlikealien spae 2onster alling *i2sel0 =ehovah 3 iswathing us and 2aking us dane like heap puppets 0or *is own insidious purposes. *ede2ands that we /whorship/ *i2, and so we surely 2ust. And i0 you say that the&ub)enius is deieved, that there is no alien )od o0 Wrath na2ed =ehovah, then the&ub)enius will attak Y0U!$ou are wrongK we are rightK8ehovah ? told us so and webelieved it. AlrightJ Now roll over and go bak to /sleep/...@#y /)od-s hird eg,/ you-dthink these hu2an beings didn-t know what insane bogus religions arefor!!

%)NORE *%& 8NOR" he ter2 -&ub)enius- is used beause it is the 2ostmironic description possible, youfool. o pratie and preah the sa2e things isutter 2adness. &o2eti2es o22uniation 2ust be 2ade more difficult andirritating than necessary, in order to onvey ertain dangerous o2ple7ities. %heknowledge must not fall into the wrong hands#7SCIENCE DOES NOTREO2E THE TERROR OF THE GODS.7

The Ch$r/h o' S$%Gen,$sis an Order o0 &o00ers and #lasphe2ers, dediated tootal &lak, delving into (okery &iene, &ado0uturists, (egaphysis,&atolography, &hi6ophreniatris, (orealis2, &arastrophy, Cynisareligion,Apoalyptiono2y, E&'etorationalis2, *ypno1'ediatris, &ubli2ini2alis2,&atyriology, "isto1topianity, &ardoniology, 8asiestiouis2, Ridiulophagy, and(isellatheisti heology.

@An antinonprophit subsidiary o0 THE SU!GENIUS FOUNDATION IN2ESTENTCOR&ORATION FOR THE FOR!IDDEN SCIENCES9@/%he inal 0rganization/ with*eAdBuArters at #"A"A %(E CONRO A#ORAOR%E&, "allas, e7asK

/&peiali6ing in 8raudulent but 'ro0ound E7planations 0or %ne7pliable (ani0estations &ine he8uture #egan./

WE *E )EN%&E& O8 *E 'O&1*(AN RACE, in order to preserve li0e on this planet 0ro2i22anent destrution, reestablish intelligene, regain &lak, ast out the 8alse 'rophets, s2other 0orever the0ear o0 0ear %tsel0, reieve the Buestionable gi0ts o0 the #e0oreli0e and o0 the &pae "wellers, beo2e asOver2en, un2ask the Conspiray, grip the reigns o0 hu2an evolution, ontrol reprodution and 2utation,deipher the Code, plaate the &tark 8ist o0 Re2oval, ahieve i2e Control, see hat Whih (ust Co2e o'ass, beo2e as gods, 0ind the wins with the &issors o0 &ight, avert the Rupture o0 the EBuilibriu2, andseure the 0inanial blessings o0 =ehovah 3 the )od o0 Wrath 0or ourselves and our desendants, do herebyad2it ourselves as suh and thus ordain this Advertise2ent o0 the &ub)enius Rae o0 Earth.

YOU AY NOW STO&READING FORE2ER

O *E CAAO), OR"ER 8OR( AN" (E(#ER&*%'

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