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Stephen Covey's 7 Habits of 7 Habits of Highly Effective PeopleHighly Effective People

Presented by:

Monica van der Weele

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Objectives

to share the lessons that one may learn from this book

to generate an acute awareness of the character ethic

to equip my friends with a concrete “road-map” for further self-exploration of the book’s principles on a day to day basis

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Outline

Introduction

Paradigms, Principles, Habits & Effectiveness

Private Victory 45 min.

BREAK

Public Victory

Renewal

Discussion /Feedback 45 min.

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IntroductionThe author’s motivations

a personal experience concerning his son

expectancy theory:

– how perceptions are formed

– how they govern the way we see

– & how the way we see governs the way we behave

in-depth study of success literature over the past 200 years

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IntroductionThe Personality Ethic

dominant approach in the past 50 years

social image consciousness

two paths:

– human and public relations techniques

– positive metal attitude approach

inspiring & valid maxims

some clearly manipulative & even deceptive techniques

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Introduction The Character Ethic

150 years pre World War I

idea that there are basic principles of effective living

enduring happiness and success by integrating these into our basic characters

foundational and catalytic

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Introduction Primary & Secondary Greatness

the Personality Ethic is of secondary importance

natural systems based on the law of harvest!

the “7 habits” are basic - they are primary - representing the internalization of correct principles upon which enduring happiness and success are based.

“what you are shouts so loudly in my ears I cannot hear what you say”

- Emerson

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ParadigmsThe way we see

commonly used to mean: a model, theory, perception, assumption - or frame of reference

a map - but the map is not the territory!

Awareness of our own paradigms:

our paradigms, whether correct or incorrect, are the source of our attitudes and behaviors – and determine our relationships with others

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ParadigmsParadigm Shift

Thomas Kuhn: The Structure of Scientific Revolutions

instantaneous as well as gradual

the learning curve is determined by one’s basic character!

Being is Seeing. Seeing is Being.

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PrinciplesThe Principle-Centered Paradigm

the Character Ethic is based on the fundamental idea that there are principles that govern human effectiveness

principles are natural laws that cannot be broken

constitute the “objective territory” (not just the map)

not esoteric, not mysterious, not “religious”

self-evident and easily validated by any individual

Deep within our conscience and common sense

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PrinciplesGrowth and Change

a process: “a thousand mile journey begins with the first step”

the Personality Ethic amounts to “borrowing strength”

Inside-Out: private victories before public victories!

the way we see the problem is the problem

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HabitsAn Overview

Our character, basically, is a composite of our habits

deeply rooted, often unconscious

consistent and cohesive

express our character

“We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence, then, is not and act, but a habit.”

- Aristotle

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HabitsDefinition

the intersection of:

takes all 3 for a habit!

iterative spiral: seeing & being

what to doand why

wantto do

howto do

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The 7 Habits The Maturity Continuum

Dependence

Interdependence

Independence

PublicVictory

3. Put firstthings first

4. Think Win-Win

1. Be Proactive

PrivateVictory

2. Begin with theend in mind

5. Seek first tounderstand...

6. Synergize

7.

Sh

arp

en

th

e s

aw

YOU

I

WE

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The 7 HabitsEffectiveness

for all assets: physical, financial and human

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Habit 1-BE PROACTIVEOverview

self-awareness

– a unique human capability

– the reason why we can break our habits

3 social/deterministic maps:

– genetic determination

– psychic determination

– environmental determination

1. Be Proactive

PrivateVictory

Stimulus Response

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Habit 1-BE PROACTIVEBetween Stimulus and Response

ResponseStimulusFreedom

toChoose

Self-Awareness

ImaginationConscience

IndependentWill

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Habit 1-BE PROACTIVE“Proactivity” Defined

response-ability

= the ability to subordinate a an impulse to a value

3 central values identified by Victor Frankl:

The CREATIVEThe EXPERIENTIAL

The ATTITUDINAL

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Habit 1-BE PROACTIVECircle of Concern /Circle of Influence

Maintaining a proactive focus:

Circleof

Influence

Circleof

Influence

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Habit 1-BE PROACTIVEDirect, Indirect and No Control

The problems we face are threefold:

involvingourbehavior

DirectControl

Possible

IndirectControl

Possible

involvingotherpeople’sbehavior

NoControl

Possibleour past& situationalrealities

solved byworking onour habits

solved bychanging ourmethods ofinfluence

= PrivateVictories(habits 1,2,3)

= PublicVictories(habits 4,5,6)

solved bychanging theway we see...

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Habit 1-BE PROACTIVEAt the Heart of the Circle of Influence

Circleof

Influence

Our ability tomake

and keepcommitments& promises

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Habit 2 - BEGIN WITH THE END IN MIND Overview

the most fundamental application: visualization of your death & the graveside perspectives from family, friends, work colleagues and the community

underlying principle: all things are created twice - mental (1st creation) and physical (2nd creation)

default verses design

personal leadership verses Management (what and how)

imagination and conscience

PrivateVictory

2. Begin with theend in mind

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Habit 2 - BEGIN WITH THE END IN MIND Highest Leverage PC Work

whatever is at the center of our lives will be the source of our:

CENTER

1. SECURITY

2. GUIDANCE

3. POW

ER

4. WISDO

M

- SENSE OF WORTH- IDENTITY- EMOTIONAL ANCHORAGE

- SOURCE OF DIRECTION IN LIFE- INTERNAL FRAME OF REFERENCE- STANDARDS AND PRINCIPLES

- FACULTY TO ACT- STRENGTH & POTENCY TO ACCOMPLISH SOMETHING

- YOUR SENSE OF BALANCE- UNDERSTANDING THE WHOLE

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Habit 2 - BEGIN WITH THE END IN MIND Alternative Centers

spouse centeredness

family centeredness

money centeredness

work centeredness

possessions centeredness

pleasure centeredness

friend/enemy centeredness

church centeredness

self centeredness

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Habit 2 - BEGIN WITH THE END IN MIND A Principle Center (1)

Security

– principles do not change (only our understanding of them does)

– principles do not react to anything

– principles are larger than circumstances

Wisdom and Guidance

– principles supply the correct maps

Personal Power

– unrestricted by the attitudes, behaviors and actions of others

Only limitation: the natural consequences of the principles themselves - a universal law.

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etc.

Habit 2 - BEGIN WITH THE END IN MIND A Principle Center (2)

The principle center puts all other centers into perspective

self

PRINCIPLES

spouse family

money

work

possessionspleasure

friend/enemy

church

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Habit 2 - BEGIN WITH THE END IN MIND Using a Mission Statement

through conscience (of our own uniqueness) we detect our missions in life by working within our circle of influence

it will take time and should be reviewed regularly

the process is as important as the product

use your whole brain:

– using imagination to visualize and affirm (right brain activity)

– capturing these images and plotting them (left: roles and goals)

AFFIRMATIONS

- personal- positive- present tense- emotional- visualized

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Habit 3 - PUT FIRST THINGS FIRSTOverview

The practical fulfillment of habits 1 and 2 (i.e.the 2nd creation)

exercising independent will to become principle centered through day-to-day effective self-management

“Manage form the LEFT” (versus lead from the RIGHT)

a measure of the value we place on ourselves!

ensuring that your habits are a function of your values - not the mood and/or circumstances of the moment

management amounts to discipline in the area of life and time management

3. Put firstthings first

PrivateVictory

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Habit 3 - PUT FIRST THINGS FIRSTFour Generations of Time

Management

Notes andChecklists

1. recognitionof demands

+ Calendars and

AppointmentBooks

2. attempt tolook ahead

+ prioritization

3. Setting ofgoals and

short / long term planning

+ Calendars &Appointment

Books

Emergingeffectiveness

approach(relationships &

results)

Satisfactionis a function ofexpectations

& time!

currentefficiencyfocused

approach(things & time)

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Habit 3 - PUT FIRST THINGS FIRSTQuadrant II Activities

important

not important

urgent not urgent

I.crisespressing problemsdeadline driven projects

II.prevention, PC activitiesrelationship buildingrecognizing opportunitiesplanning, recreation

III.interruptions (some calls)some mails & reportssome meetingspopular activities

IV.Trivia, busy worksome mailsome phone callstime wasters

require moreinitiative &proactivity!

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Habit 3 - PUT FIRST THINGS FIRSTQuadrant I Results

important

urgent

I.

• stress• burnout• crisis management• always putting out fires• problem minded people• deadline driven producers

you areovercome by“waves” ofactivity!

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Habit 3 - PUT FIRST THINGS FIRSTQuadrant III Results

notimportant

urgent

III.

• Short term focus• crises management• chameleon character reputation• feel victimized and out of control• inability to set goals and make plans• shallow or broken relationships

you are work-in terms ofother people’sexpectationsand priorities!

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Habit 3 - PUT FIRST THINGS FIRSTInto the Danger Zone

notimportant

Urgent / not urgent

III. & IV.

• total irresponsibility!• Fired from jobs• depend on others for basics

effective peoplestay out of here!

urgent or not,they aren’timportant!

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Habit 3 - PUT FIRST THINGS FIRSTQuadrant II Results

important

Not urgent

II.

• vision, perspective• balance• discipline• control• few crises

The

of effectivepersonalmanagement!

Feedingopportunities& starvingproblems!

P/PC balance!

I.

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Habit 3 - PUT FIRST THINGS FIRSTLearn to Say NO

NB: you are always saying NO to something!

Quadrants III and IV must make way for Quadrant II

a center of correct principles and a focus on our personal mission empowers us with the wisdom to take these yes/no decisions effectively

NO.

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Habit 3 - PUT FIRST THINGS FIRSTMoving to Quadrant II

A Quadrant II Organizer Tool will meet the following six criteria:

COHERENCE

BALANCE

QUADRANT II FOCUS

PEOPLE DIMENSION

FLEXIBILITY

PORTABILITY

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Habit 3 - PUT FIRST THINGS FIRSTBecoming a QII Self-Manager

Long-Term Organizing:

WEEKLY Organizing:

MissionStatement

Roles Goals

WeeklyRoles

WeeklyGoals

PlansSchedule

Delegate

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Habit 3 - PUT FIRST THINGS FIRSTDelegation: Increasing P & PC

we delegate to TIME (efficiency) or PEOPLE (effectiveness)

temptation to delegate to time

delegating to people empowers both parties

Producer:

Manager:

input output

input

output

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Habit 3 - PUT FIRST THINGS FIRSTDelegation: Gofer verses

Stewardship stewardship focuses on RESULTS rather than METHODS

5 aspects must be mutually understood:

DESIRED RESULTS

GUIDELINES

RESOURCESACCOUNTABILITY

CONSEQUENCES

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Public Victory Introduction

self-mastery precedes good relationships

the emotional bank account paradigm - 6 major deposits:

– understand the individual

– attend to little things

– keep commitments

– clarify expectations

– show personal integrity

– apologize sincerely

PublicVictory

4. Think Win-Win

5. Seek first tounderstand...

6. Synergize

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Habit 4 - THINK WIN/WINOverview

not a technique - but a total philosophy of human interaction

one of six paradigms of interaction:

– win / win (a better way)

– win / lose (authoritarian approach)

– lose / win (loser / peacemaker at all costs)

– lose / lose (enemy centeredness)

– win (other parties irrelevant)

– win / win or no dealPublicVictory

4. Think Win-Win

It depends...

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Habit 4 - THINK WIN/WIN5 Dimensions

(1)win/win

character

(2)win/win

relationships

(3)win/win

agreements

IntegrityMaturityAbundance Mentality

w/wl/w

l/l w/l

cons

ider

atio

n ->

courage ---------->

the emotional bank account

Supporting systems (4) and processes (5)

Performance & Partnership(focus on results not methods)

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Habit 5: Seek first to understand…Overview

within your circle influence

four basic forms of communication: speak, read, write and listen

character and communication

a profound paradigm shift:

emotional bank account deposits

understanding of the center

when you listen, you learn PublicVictory

5. Seek first tounderstand...

ignoring pretendingselectivelistening

attentivelistening

empathiclistening

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Habit 5: Seek first to understand…4 Autobiographical Responses

1. we evaluateby either agreeing

or disagreeing2. we probefrom our ownframe of reference

4. we advisebased on ourown experiences

3. we interpretbased on our own

motives and behavior

communicationis logical/open

Generally:

asking questionsand give counsel

communicationis emotional

reverting toempathic listening

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Habit 5: Seek first to understand…AND then to be understood

part of win/win!!

ethos pathos logos

1. 2. 3.

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Habit 6: SYNERGIZEOverview

PublicVictory

6. Synergize

the whole is greater then the sum of the parts

the relationship between the parts is significant

WE LIVE IN AN INTERDEPENDENT REALITY

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Habit 6: SYNERGIZEDefinition

when faced with our greatest challenges… with:

we create NEW ALTERNATIVES - something that wasn’t there before!

the creativity can be terrifying as the outcome is unsure...

4 unique humanendowments

self-awarenessimaginationconscience

independent will

the truemotive of

WIN / WIN

skill ofempathiclistening

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Habit 6: SYNERGIZELevels of Communication

Defensive (win/lose or lose/win)

Respectful (compromise)

Synergistic (win//win)

TRUST

COOPERATION

high

high

low

low

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Habit 6: SYNERGIZEThe Middle Way

a higher way!

com

pro

mis

e

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Habit 6: SYNERGIZEIntrapersonal and interpersonal

Synergy

L R

The essence of synergyis to value the differences!

• to move beyond our own• perceptual limitations

• to increase our own awareness

• to affirm others

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Habit 6: SYNERGIZEThe Growth & Change Force Field

restraining forces

driving forces

current level of performance

4 5 6

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Habit 7: Sharpen the SawOverview

PERSONAL PC !

7.

Sh

arp

en

th

e s

aw

Principles ofBalanced

Self-Renewal

Principles ofBalanced

Self-Renewal

Sometimes when I considerwhat tremendous consequencescome from little things…I am tempted to think…there are nolittle things.

BruceBarton

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Habit 7: Sharpen the Saw4 Dimensions of Renewal

PHYSICALExercise, Nutrition,Stress Management

SOCIAL /EMOTIONAL

Service, Empathy,Synergy, Intrinsic Security

SPIRITUALValue Clarification &

Commitment, Study &Meditation

MENTALReading, Visualizing,

Planning, Writing

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Conclusion